genie
you were my first girlfriend, first sexual experience. wow it seems like yesterday, i was dancing on a table, you were looking up at me as though i was some sort of weird mutant. you seemed so cute and bemused by me, i could se the sparkle in your eyes from that table as i flirted with ya.
later we met at a party and you grabbed me as i walked towards you, i was going to give you a hug and say in my stupid skoolboy english 'bonjour madame genie.' but you just grabbed me and dragged me up the staircase into a bedroom.
we stayed in bed for hours, it was magick genie, magick, i remember me using all my french words and stopping at calling you l'oiseau, i think that name stuck and as i write this it has triggered another memory with some one else, that's why it means something to me, i understand now. 'the bird.' 'those birds.'
i stayed with you all night and in the morning we dressed and i walked home, my body felt lighter and i felt as if i was floating. it was a special time, it stayed with me all my life as a beautiful moment. you were very beautiful and loving and had a cute french accent.
a year later i met you at a night club, you were dressed in bondage gear and looked like a hot punk stripper, no longer the sweet provincial country girl. i think we hung out for a while after that, my memory is vauge and unreliable at this point but wow genie you were something else.
i was far to young to know anything about love but i think i was looking for that moment for the rest of my days, i think that's what i was looking for, the softness of you.
for that i should thank you, i've heard girls talk about their first time and it always sounds awful, men never really talk about theirs other than in bragging and crass ways, but i have a vivid memory of mine being perfection.