everything comes full circle, kite surfing girl and i chat online for a while, it's our first conversation in years, and years, and i was only writing about her in this blog a few days ago. anyway as usual she wants to get married.
we chat about our time together, she's in guadalupe wants to come see me or me to see her, she say's she will pay for all expenses except flight. she says she misses me and wonders why we didn't get married all those years ago. what can i say, if i had a few dollars for every girl that said that.
actually strangely it's made me sad, but i shake it off as the conversation proceeds. i said 'we didn't get married cos you said that i snored, was to fat and smoked to much weed.'
anyway we have a very funny conversation and i remember why i loved her. she made me laugh and she still has a good brain, she also speaks about 7 languages and looks very sexy but at the end of the day it was her brain i loved most. but she was trouble, like a whole load of fucking trouble, yeah i know i am used to trouble but this was executive trouble, which is way beyond double trouble, trouble and trouble with a capital T.
executive trouble is almost a fucking clusterfuck, and kite surfing girl is chaos with curves. however trouble in all it's many forms eventually finds me, it's the magnetic attraction of like attracting like, not that i am trouble at all, but i'm good at working with it and the troubled always feel safe around me. im a sanctuary to trouble. i should get a grant from the govt.
oh kite surfing girl, you were already married to all those extreme sports bozos, to the wind, to your dramas, i was just a nice little distraction that played by my own rules, i was an enigma for you, a man, you couldn't get me but i intrigued you none the less, you never met any one like me before. sigh!
we did come close though in a way, it was a business proposition for you, and i would only marry for love. i'm a dumb romantic but i remain true to that side of myself.
as i tell her this she starts saying she could love me.
i say, ksg you do love me, your just like all women in my life, you won't allow yourself to actually be happy. i will not reinforce your negative self esteem, i will not mistreat you, be creul, dishonour you, but that's not what you want. you need men that re enforce your own negative self image and loathing. anyone like me that actually loves you doesn't stand a chance.
we have a long long conversation, she asks if i am in love with any one. i say yeah i am.
it's a strange thing though, the winds have turned, the breeze blows her back and i stand at the shore watching her wings,
then something weird happens, my ex wife debbie calls me.
now this has to be the strangest phone call i have ever had. we have not spoken in over 15 years. i'm so disorientated that i actually have to ask who it is again and again.
'it's debbie, your ex wife, the mother of your child.'
'oh yeah that debbie.' i say.
more dramas. fuck i have a strange life, i love it but man i'd really like a break, a nice girl to have and hold, a coconut drink and some where safe to chill out the rest of my days, what are the chances?