Friday, May 24, 2019

the moments
wake up in a strange sweat, my head is expanded into something else. an old friend rings me up, we speak for a long time and i understand our connection is much deeper than perhaps i gave it credit, unbreakable bond.
cathy has always been love incarnate so it's interesting to hear her speak about her journey. she is and always has been beautiful to me, kind and demonstratively loving. even after 20 years she tells me non stop how much she loves me. it's easy to believe her. 
we talk about jake and his current status. she used to hang out with jake a little. we talk about travel, we talk about tambourines and magick stuff, we talk about darkness and light, we talk about vibrations and resonance, some mayan stuff and the fact we should see one another soon. i guess i need to do something but all this choice of movement is making me do nothing. eventually the pressure will get so high i will do something, i guess. inertia is crawling up my spine making it's way into my brain box. it's either going to snap, crackle or pop. 
i have a interesting conversation with my counterpart dolphin persona, a man fish i surfed with for years who also has a similar heart based approach to life the universe and everything, he tells me of his journey, a strange tangled tale of the pursuit of money and how it damaged his marriage. i don't know what to say, the pursuit of money is everyones ambition it appears except ours, we choose love over cash. 
then there's you cryptic, secretive and unavailable to me. what can i count upon, only myself and the handful of people who seem to be manifesting from my long distant past. i wrestle with this occurrence. i don't go backwards but these people are catching up to me, they all seem to be there now. what's going down, i wonder. i really need to face this strange appearance of the past and understand why it has occurred at this time. 
maybe a short trip is in order. this would satisfy my need to get away and also my curiosity to explore this phenomena. 
mission control is shaping up, kitchen tidied, table reasonable and now the deck transformation into a new area i can play in, a hammock space for swingers. there's some outside work happening as well, a reenforced retaining wall and a new levelled corridor along the side of my house. 
the rest of the time i work upon my short story collection, a second edition with many changes to the first, longer stories tidied up and adapted. then i will put out volume 2 which will be a collection of new stories. it's a lot of laborious work, in front of a computer but i have to do it. 

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