Tuesday, April 09, 2019

fickle fate, ambivalent destiny, random non action, the observation delineation between states of matter, being and antimatter. she is a particle, you're a wave, she's a neural connection, you're a synaptic spark both meeting resistance from the enemy. it's powerful anti magick magick, it works against the universe. it's neither here nor there, but it does leak into our lives, disrupting and leaving all of us vulnerable to the point we will only have one another.
this is entirely predictable yet it's very difficult to navigate for me, emotionally complex and i'm uncertain how to express it. all i can say is i fear that disconnection again, it's in the pit of my stomach and it makes me violently ill when i think about it, especially when our communication is fucked with. 
we are all targets by the adversary of everything we believe in.
i guess this is what i signed up for so i have to face the situation head on, as it folds over itself again and again. it's like being in the cake mix, from yearning to churning. oh well mission, get on with it.
i was okay this morning but disconnection blues hit and left me feeling odd, i completely forgot your phone was juice depleted. then when i speak to her she tells me about her situation and it's almost the same as ours. it's all making strange sense once i put it into the frame. it's deep karma, profoundly converging for all of us. 
i have to trust you will manage your aspects and i do have complete faith in you. i have to trust myself and i have great faith in that.
but i also have to trust she can manage this which is considerably harder however she has surprised me in her intuitive understanding of everything so far so i'm positive we can all move through it with integrity intact.
for me and her it's not karmic but contractive. we have unfinished business and i have to complete my part of the arrangement. but i so want you to feel safe about this whole thing, it really is the most important part of it for me. that you feel completely secure and safe. 

No comments: