driving west, not something i do often but this morning we are picking up lexo the new cupcake car, trading in the mini s. that mini s suited miss cupcake but not with a baby, it's no good for babies, nope. lexo will be perfect, it has all mod cons and other bits and bobs, it's the bees knees. i drive it up and down, it's got nice comfy seats, you could have great sex in this car and not get poked in the ribs by an inorganic protruding object.
we head into grandville to get a coffee and ponder the sale, i see a sign that says, 'awarded best coffee in sydney' so we walk in.
a strange vortex transports me and miss cupcake into downtown tripoli, awful arab music penetrates our psych, makes me edgy, the coffee is mediocre and everything is loaded with sugar, no wonder they are so tense in the middle east, the sugar would make them all hyper and the awful music would want to make you kill the nearest person. it's nuts in there although there's some exotic looking woman behind the counter that looks interesting, however she's wearing a crucifix and like every true vampyre i'm slightly repulsed.
driving back with miss cupcake i'm confused at how perfect we are, peas in a pod, it's eating away at me, her brilliant brain all uncluttered and free from bullshit now, wow, she's the sharpest knife in the kitchen these days, come a long way, she's becoming a singularity, i tell her she's cool. she's beginning to get me, far out, i think another six months like this and she will know me, she will have gazed into the abyss and seen my true nature. jesus that's freaky and exciting.
are we married?
it feels like im in a happy sexless marriage, she's pregnant to some other man and i'm having my affairs, it's so fucked up it's perfect.
what the hell! my guts hurt a bit, squishy and tangled up, knotted a little due to ambigious emotions but i feel pretty good about life, yeah it's working out fine, just want more of it. it's strange when you get it together, stop dealing in bullshit, bullshit people and bullshit situations, just whittle away down to people you actually really fucking love. what else is there, everything else, why...it's just bullshit.