ah disappointment floods through my veins like a dangerous acid burning up my creativity, my spark, my power, sucked up into a void inhabited with voidiods and zombies. at least i have the anti cluster fuck, it's opposite, something good, honest and nurturing feminine energy.
my sleep deprived body is failing, i can feel the physical manifestation of this awful experience weighing down oppressing me, like a small cage, my expansive nature trapped and sealed by toxic stupidity and the company it keeps.

i have to take responsibility, i have no choice. i took a hit, it's not fatal, i should have seen it coming, stupid me, it's all there to in the pattern of the foggy past, your friends who tore us apart, each one in a progression of scavenger tactics over our relationship, until a carcass was left. i was always the odd one out, squished between all these horrible forces you seemed to embrace in your drug fucked alcoholic states. collateral damage. fall out from just your world of hurt and self hate projection at even, love. how little you value that.
that's the trouble with our future, i seen it all before in our past now. clique.

i came in at the right time, i heard that call and i was sent by forces you would never ever understand it's a war baby, i fight for your child and you shoot me in the back. motherhood gone wrong already.
there's no doubt in the eye of my heart. i was sent out for you, i was there when you really needed some one, i came as a friend, with no agenda other than keep you and your baby safe and maybe heal some thing for us both.

i hear the plead, diminished responsibility, i hear it everywhere through the land, we are a diminished responsibility species, no consciousness. it's the final programme, we are at the end of the line, i took the bullet for you. i'm free now. i don't owe you nothing, that baby is your baby, your red headed friend can play dad and offer support, or even the stupid one whom you defend. the killing joke.

amongst the multitude i walk for she has sent me as as her captain on my mission, liberation. libertaria. madagascan deja vu.
each trial, each battle just makes me stronger, i have no fear anymore, i don't fear you at all. i have no fear. (except big moths)