Monday, October 11, 2010

the past falls away, into tomorrows shadow, i am gone yesterday, and here today.
today i awake so early, filled with strange excitement, anticipation for my friends x ray, i can feel the energy racing through my body, pace yourself i suggest, it's going to be a long day.

miss cupcake lay's upon a table, i see her feet, her toes, the gaps between them, i'm a bit scared in case she catches me staring at them so i force myself to look away, at the screens, at the nurse, at the walls, at anything waiting for the scanning to start.
between the scanning head and a soft olive curvature of skin is a layer of gel, the nurse begins the scan, static and moonscape landscape appear on the screens, shapes flicker, shadows rise, shades of grey, white blobs, ever moving, changing and obtuse, what are these shapes, a baby, it's eluding me, and then a flash of hand, a wave, the nurse offers some geography and i begin to get my bearings.
head, eye's, ears, nose, arms, hands, legs, feet, spinal cord, umbilical cord, kidneys, heart, all lay on a sleeping bag of placenta, snug little girl, strong heartbeat, pumping away, life growing, spirited and vital, this is the little girl, i feel a tear but i know i have to hold it, this is not my moment. it's a very emotional moment though.
we watch the 3D imaging, it's incredible, something from the future, i'm watching the future, something coming into being, although it is now, it will be the future. strange bone images, slightly egon schiele, these hands, i can't see those feet but i know they are there.

life has come to you, spirit has chosen you, a soul has arrived, it's a blessing, we both know this, our children have chosen us, we are the chosen people, it is indeed a blessing.

miss cupcake, tired and feeling ill, i look at her in a fleeting moment, she's amazing, yeah there's no doubt in my heart, nope your not fat, no your ass is not to big, in all the years i knew you you never looked so beautiful and whatever happened in the past pales into insignificance at the fact there's a future growing inside you.

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