early morning i'm sitting in a cafe reading about a great show i used to watch called twin peaks, david lynch's first tv series which broke all the rules and i was the first thing i watched diligently. he says the tv executives demanded an ending prematurely due to bad ratings. fuck i hate these executives, when i get to ride my blimp and become ruler of the world there will no longer be executives controlling art.
i visit my doctor who says i look like a kgb agent or a criminal dressed in black and a big berlin overcoat and hat, she tells me my results are in. i sit down for the bad news but she tells me my blood is perfect, 'the blood of an 18 year old except in one area, vitamin d.'
she says i need more sun.
'i know,' i say. 'can you send me on a holiday?'
'where would you like to go.'
'on a cruise.'
i leave and wonder out through the rain, through the puddles and people getting up, i don't want to stick around, i just want to close my eyes and feel warm. i retreat back to mission control, looking forwards to a coffee with miss cupcake but it dosn't eventuate, instead once again some strange male control impulse destroys everything and i know she is to angry and upset for coffee, so i wander the rooms of mission control, attempting to keep warm and eat some molasses i find in the fridge, it's the only food source i have at the moment so i guess it will have to do till pay day, i have budgeted for coffee surprisingly, i'm thinking about that first sip but the rain deters me and makes me feel sad.
i should take pan for his clean and shampoo but it's so wet there's no point. maybe tomorrow.