personal self directed healing is part of the responsibility that a man has to embark upon at some point in his incarnation. this comes in so many forms for me, unravelling my dna, clearing my past histories, finding some meaning for my life, destroying my egos as they form again and again, dealing with emotional issues, physical issues, using intellectual technology ie, thinking tools, dissolving the mind, hacking the universe, reprogramming the brain, seeing the truth from the lie, that does includes my own lie, knowing humility and humbleness, knowing when to be strong and when to be meek, knowing the multitude of selves that inhabit, forgiving my self for the things i did as a younger man, allowing myself to not be attached to the outcomes, understanding my subconsciousness, listening to my heart, knowing when to surrender as a mystic and when to be a god.
fortunately i have met some great teachers on my way. my enemies, my friends, my family, my dog, the plants.
all of these processes assist us to find out who we are and stay true to that. it's not something that comes from outside, although the outside reflects it. a large part of my own evolution is the idea that i will need to be focused at my point of death, i need to have made my peace and let go of life so that i dissolve and no longer incarnate. right action in life makes this possible, the astral body holds all karmic records. i have been given the opportunity many times over to do this, but i always return as the bodhisattva, for this is part of the process of liberation, assisting others heal, finding their way towards something beyond the maya that we are trapped in through choice and delusion.
every step of the way now, every moment gets me closer to where i need to be, every awful challenge i am faced with makes me stronger, it doesn't kill me, it feeds me. i am loved by the universe, by the plant spirits, by my son and my tribe, that's all i need right now.
as we move through kali yuga the imperative becomes clearer, now is the time not to fear, not to generate fear. for fear is the mind killer, it is the maya, it is the illusion.
you can't grasp this intellectually, you can't just use your brain to get it. it takes the warrior path, the one where you have to recognise how the only war worth fighting is the one within.