man it felt good to spill the beans, they just poured out, all of it, everything. nothing could be contained anymore, it was tidal, emotional and true. must be the first time i have ever been so raw and honest about my soul to you and i felt so accepted. that's new!
you were amazing man, always were, but yesterday you showed me something so fucking beautiful and i am so grateful you listened, you acknowledged, you understood and you loved me. it was restoration, i felt your love, it was healing. all those conversations we had years ago about memes, about the glamour, you were listening to me!  
the yoga man, follow the yoga, true yoga not the body stuff. it's going to bring you more riches than you will ever find in the city of illusions. keep your feet in both worlds just like she is doing but know one is real the other unreal. one will suck your life from you the other will replenish. the world is upside down and inside out, everything we think is right is wrong and all we have been chasing is a false kingdom built on no foundation other than money, blood and bones, every moment it gives you something it attaches a karmic debt. eat a chocolate it's the slave trade, buy a shirt it's the fashion industry and the war on women, fill a script it's the pharmaceutical. a line of coke is probably the death of 100 mexicans trapped in an war of brutality and death. there is no escape no matter how smart we think we are, the glamour has us enthralled. it's memetic now, in our heads, in our belief systems, in our minds like seeds sprouting bad ideas and lies. i know you know this because you feel it in your spirit just like i do. you be true to what is true jake at all costs. i love you, you are my beauty in the world. 
i cast my mind to my friend justine who was killed in america by a policeman whom she called to assist her, justine was the lightworker to end all lightworkers, she was one of the most brilliant women. her first words to me were, 'your either a genius or from another space time.'
we became friends when i replied, 'both.'
she asked me to write her book reviews for her bookshop which i did for many years, she was always there, always in her quest for true love, spiritual meaning and when i told her about mine she smiled in that way only the enlightened could. justine was enlightened, she was grace on earth and her death effected thousands of people cross continents. in the usa there were vigils, marches and protests, in sydney we just mourned but i knew that this was her mission. she was love itself and she was the one person that could unite so many in her shining truth. it was tragic but her soul purpose upon earth was this, to show us all how to live better lives and be true to our hearts. wow, i miss her now, she would be so cool to talk to, a true  noble soul.

okay the week shifts again, plans change, my only day off is wiped out as people fly into sydney to visit me, so i have to go into the city tomorrow when all i really want to do is stay home but these are special friends and i need to make the effort. 
i have neglected those that love me for so 5 years so i guess now is the time to reconnect with them, accept them again. i banished everyone from my life in tim's wake, every single person i knew couldn't fill that loss yet they all hung in there wanting me back. i just couldn't face it, anything that took me back there. the one thing about me is i very rarely go backwards, but maybe now that's what i have to do, see the people i left behind. let them see me now. i made such a vast space for you it seems like it's gone now and being filled with distractions i need to explore lest i become stagnant and immobile and devoid of choices so lookout world it's the return of the king without a queen without a kingdom without a crown without within. 
what does this king have.
a text message every day that you are on track to the other thing i have... 
...a vision of a ferry ride off the italian amalfi coastline, leaving sorrento to capri and seeing you seeing me, and then we both know everything we need to know. 
it will be like the da vinci code but much better written, much more multi dimensional, complex, more cosmic in scope, a romantic comedy for the new ages, completely unbelievable and filled with magick.
i am good, i am stronger, i'm better than ever now. my weakness is  my strength, my darkness is my light, my heart is true and my path divine. i am all.