last meal in the uk and mum asks me what i think of england.
'i think it has some kind of sickness, it's energetically very sick, like it has terminal cancer and suddenly everyone is realising their days are numbered. it's lost it's spirit and sense of identity, it crushes and drains it's population while offering them reality tv, sports, celebrity and the idea of a healthy democracy but there are dark forces at work within it and through it the cancer has spread into the host and my prognosis is that it is terminal, the evidence is there staring everyone in the face but you are all in denial because no one here can think for themselves.'
as usual my mother launches into a tirade against me, ungrateful, selfish, rude, stupid etc, all in front of jake, i shouldn't be surprised but i am again thinking what the hell am i doing here with these people.
the next evening we are on a plane heading towards israel and mum is sitting next to a town planner and architect from england's midlands. i am sitting between my brother who is reading the newspaper and my dad whom i attempting to engage in lateral thinking puzzles to stimulate his brain but he can't ask me more that 3 questions without demanding an answer. it's depressing me and frustrating him.
my mum asks her young friends what they think of england and they reply, 'it's sick, the whole country is suffering from a sickness, it's no longer the place we know.'
my mum tells me this later, mentioning these educated and professional men, she looks quite disturbed by the conversation.
after a thoughtful moment i tell her that when i say something she can only degrade and humiliate me, but if someone else tells her the same thing she thinks it's insightful and sophisticated and can't wait to share it.'
there's a moment when she looks at me, it's a flash but i know it is there and she knows, a split second where the whole nature of reality converges and everything is known, the truth they say comes in a blinding flash of light, and thats what she saw and i witnessed.
the healing has begun