reconnecting with miss cupcake is tricky, we are tired and run down, there's some weird energy hanging around us, i just wanna hold her, i don't wanna let her go but there's this fortress around her, it's impenetrable. i don't really wanna penetrate it, just let it dissolve away and sneak in but there's no chance of that happening with this disconnect, defence mechanisms are up. me to, i feel fragile and somewhat vulnerable.
she wants to sleep so we say goodbye, i hug her but i can feel her resistance.
i wander down stairs wondering what is wrong with me, i get inside my car and see my book on emotions, i get out and walk back to miss cupcakes house. i have to do unblock this strange energy that sits within me, i have to take control of this and at least speak my truth.
what's the right action?
there is no right action or wrong action really, there's no right time or wrong time. i've loved this person through thousands of life times.
we drink a glass of water.
'i love you. you know that?'
she nods her head.
'i didn't mean for that to happen, it just did. kinda sneaked up somehow.'
she nods her head and says, 'i'm going to bed now.'
i have to leave i guess, climbing in bed with her would just be the perfect ending but it's not going to happen for me so i head home and climb in my own bed with the rest of the children of the night.