towards the end of a perfect day. bright sun, blue sky, perfect surf, lots of people strolling around eating ice creams and oblivious to me and my strange feelings of alienation and detachment, i walk with my true friend pan, we attach a tennis ball onto a super stretchy piece of elastic and tie the other end onto a tree branch. everytime i throw the ball pan goes to get it only to have it whizz passed him straight to me, its so funny, pansy's face, the look of bewilderment as he looks at me, and i am laughing, for the first time in many days, i laugh and laugh and there's a slight feeling of freedom that washes over me, just for a short while, i am happy. what is happiness, a girl on a swing a boy and his dog.
i speak to my parents in the london, my mother tells me about the huge rise in anti semitic violence, the tv, the protesters, everyone blames isreal, mum says she wants to go back there, dad tries to sound positive but he isn't, he sounds sad. i tell them about their beautiful grandson.
later in the evening i hear that mel gibbon, an actor i never really rated was charged with drunk driving and then on arrest yelling out about how the jews are behind all warfare and they control the money. apparently the police tried to cover it up but some paperwork got leaked. Gibbon blames the alcohol for his behaviour.
so far most people who come to talk to me are in agreement with him, its amazing i think, i wonder what they would say if i told them i am a jew, i'm broke, i didn't start any wars and as far as i know none of my family did. the jews are nazis, people say. mmm, i usually make an excuse and leave, but i am getting to the point where i will actually develop a stratagy based upon my usual ability to make people laugh at themselves without even knowing it, 'yes those jewish nazis giving back lands in wars they never started, for a peace that never came, jeez, dumb nazis marching themselves into concentration camps like sheep, yeah stupid jewish nazis, spreading their evil message via bob dylan, robert downey juniour, sarah bernhardt, harvey keitel, daniel day lewis, woody allen and winonna ryder, iggy, the bangles, beck, jack black, t rex, mick jones (the clash) perry farrell, richard hell, lou reed, the coen bros, leonardo da vinci, j d salinger, stan lee, jack kirby, fritz freeling, matt goring, frida kahlo, the marx bros, lenny bruce, mike leigh, fritx lang, the red hot chilli peppers, paul auster, issac singer, slash, etc all signed up members of the nazi party.
phone rings its my cousin in isreal eagle, i am momentarily stunned, and somewhat speechless, what can i say. we chat about the situation, he seems relaxed, i don't know what to say, he tells me he drove through the city of hiafa, its deserted, everyone moved south. we talk about girls for a while. he says the noise is unbelievable, sirens and missiles, he tells me Katushias come in all the time, later i tell him i'm going to send him some music, turn the stereo up loud eagle, blast the church, echo and the bunneymen, some weird dub cuts out through the walls, rock and roll can stop the war.