Friday, December 23, 2016

the blade meditation has cut away everything, it's sometimes quite beautiful and utterly terrifying. sometimes the meditation just kicks in on it's own, it must be finely attuned to my mind, maybe it is part of it i can no longer tell. it comes in so many forms, a hurtling hurricane of blades with no real form. a nano machine, millions of micro blades razor sharp splitting through time and memory, attachment and desire, an autonomous steam roller squashing and tearing apart photons, a robotic thing constructed of fractals, alien undetermined shaped, a silver octopus with razor blade tentacles, it's squeezes along neural pathways compressed and expanded, it devours like ammit but more like the hand of kali.
moments of ego slip out and float away, aspects of self shatter, elements of i are imploded while light liberated. it's unbearably painful to let so much go, all suffering and happiness, it all brings more of the same desires. i am almost free from it. 
sometimes i just find myself in a situation where i just invoke my blades and they come from the depths, from the mists, from the dark fathoms of the mental universe, they appear and churn, destroying it all, any sense of myself is passing into another fiction, nothing is true, everything permitted. 

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