one drama follows another fortunately i'm empowered by some lunar force in pisces at the moment and i seem to come up smelling like roses. 

in fact the ocean has been giving me some gifts, dolphins swim close to the shoreline, hundreds of them swimming at terrible, it's quite something and the are whales further out, breaching and blowing massive water spouts. it's strange to see the wildlife so close to the shore. crowds stop to watch. i bump into a friend who says she was out by goldie (the 1k bouy) locals swim to when she saw loads of port jackson sharks swim past. then another friend wraps herself in flowers washed up by the ocean, they are gorgeous, bright red sea flowers. she kneels down and is crowned by neptune, a mermaid indeed. the water is cold but after the initial shock it's really quite pleasant and refreshing. no waves though.

i attend a boxing session that leaves me exhausted, my limbs ache but i do love it. the sun fades away after such a beautiful taste of spring, a change is heading my way, clouds rolling in, rain is in the air. time to batten down the hatches.

everything connects up, dots and dashes, zeroes and ones. man and woman, fate and destiny. all things converge at some sort of omega point. the only thing that separates it is space and time, so these things are really one, you and i are the same thing, we just think we are separated. the best way for two people to become one is through sexual means. 

my own relationship to sex is a sort of yogic tantra union, there needs to be some bridge built between the female partner and myself, and obviously it's a sliding scale from, base level to crown. but when there's an opportunity to align i see it as my cosmic duty. intercourse is connecting, sex is mind and heart expansion, man and woman equals union, two cells wanting to subdivide into a third. 

the sex act, connects the dots. ultimately we connect. one way or another, the long way or the short way, everyone will connect. however conscious connection makes things interesting. 

im a tantric druid these days.

strangely sociable this last week, sees me chatting with a few people, anyone that will listen really. i talk to a whole bunch of people, i talk about anything, my words pour forth like rain falling here and there. i chat with a lovely english lady who likes wrestling, she's a sort of old skool punk and i like her style, i chat to a chef i meet in the markets, we talk about music and bands, he likes my the the tee shirt. he's an interesting cat but i never really get a chance to finish our conversations. i speak to a few other people, so much talking, so many people, i do more socializing this weekend than ever and now i'm talked out. i get home and swallow loads of cbd oil, i eat a few cookies and suck on a few gummies. when i fall asleep it's fast and deep. i awake feeling great. 

my next big thing is to get rid of my old sofa which i do, it's found a home in lightening ridge so now there's a big space where it used to live, and on wednesday this week, i pick up some new furnishings for mission control. amazing stuff, that will transform the place, so i'm kinda excited about that. mmm, those gummies are addictive. 

 

yesterday i read a report commissioned by an english team of data experts and information analysts and a lawyer looking at the bbc's coverage of the middle east war with hamas. the report basically said the bbc is a propaganda machine for hamas against israel. it listed over one and a half thousand reports where the bbc lied to it's viewers and stated most of the reporters were pro hamas or had affiliation to hamas. 

this really is no surprise for me, two decades ago a similar report, the balen report, was published but the bbc spent one and a half million pounds to keep it from being seen. that's tax payers money. the bbc have a history of pushing propaganda, unless you are a nut job whom agrees with their ideology of global govt. climate change, brexit, immigration, israel, it's all endorsed by the united nations and the push to de-legitimatize any sovereign nation, especially the only jewish one. why? 

because the pact the united nations has made being a marxist ideology is with political islam, a marxist theocracy. 

propaganda and inverse mirror truth is the weapon used. many people say they think everything is reversed, the good guys are the bad guys, the bad the good. women are now male, males now women ect. yet they fail to apply the same standard to israel, a place which is more democratic than their own country. the elections there are proportional representation, therefore the pm attempted to make deals with the left who rejected his offers and he was forced into a deal with the right side. the fault again lays with the left who are incapable of compromise, even in israel. 

the bbc and it's proxies are to blame for the levels of antisemitism, pushing lies and distorting truths, they have participated in advancing a real terrorist fascist ideology against a reasonable one of a jewish homeland. only people who have never lived or visited israel have warped weird ideas about it, i think most people would be shocked at how amazing the place is. people that push diversity, equity and inclusion should really use israel as a template.  maybe they are just jealous after all, that such a small country with a real minority population could succeed whereas they have failed. 

i'll always support israel, it's far from perfect but it's a fucking brilliant country. it's not a religious brilliance, it's a societal secular one. it's intelligent and reflects a well thought out society in a middle of a hellish scenario.  that tension makes it creative and vibrant. any artist worth their salt would place themselves in it's center, tel aviv, a city so wild expression comes in all forms. fuck the bbc, it's orwell's inspiration for 1984 and now we should all know why.

william holloway's compilation of writers short stories form a mosaic based around an update of the hp lovecraft mythos. and they are surprisingly good. each book contains four or five stories, different characters, different environments, different countries and cultures but all dealing with the aftermath of an apocalyptic event. very good, very creepy, well written and somewhat surprising. 
 

up bright and early, laundry garden and bed needs attention and i'm time short this week, just gotta manage time like an interdimensional pattern juggler in a nexus of cross currents. it's all happening. down the ocean and the mirror sea is made from a glass frozen in time, nothing moves. so i end up getting more cbd oil, drinking coffee with a few familiar faces talking about fasting. yes you heard that correct, olde captain mission is going to attempt a fast. my current routine is i don't eat after 20 00 and then in the morning i have a tumeric latte but no food until about 13 00.

all i need to do is between 13 00 and 20 00 is drink a few lemon waters, maybe allow myself some nuts and just focus on something other than eating. it's only 24 hours, no time really.

i've incorporated stretching into my training regime, this is all coming together. stretching, breathing, feet movement, punching, and hips, everything flows. years of bad habits are being broken up and rewired. it feels good to finally be breaking through. i've avoided all sugars and all toxins for about 1 month straight. it's making a difference, and no i only eat organic food i can feel the difference in so many ways. i do like my milk and will drink coconut milk in coffee, or unhomogenised full cream milk. i only have it in coffee nothing else. 

so here we are ready to roll and rock into the day, firing on all cylinders. makes a nice change. 

this morning after boxing i threw myself into the pacific just for a thrill. the first micro second of ice cold submergence passes like a fleeting kiss, replaced by the warm embrace of a familiar lover, last nights tension dissipates into some sort or transmuted alchemy and pleasure. everything awakened, energy centers, third eye, the whole central nervous system electrified.

i throw myself into the deep, the crystal waters clear and calm, the sky cold blue but the weather is perfect, like summer. i am alive here, alive and kicking, or at least punching.

later i have to drive straight to work, stopping off at home to arrange some money stuff for two friends. i drive south into the world while tuned out. everything is good when i have my surfs, anything can be dealt with.

rfk and tulsi gabbord join forces with trump, and suddenly there is hope. when you hear them talk about health, about food about soil and air, when you hear them speak out against big pharma, the war machine, corruption and complicity. it's not that namby pamby obama hope, that 'yes we can' lie, this is real hope about something real. not from politicians and manipulators but from really switched on people who know the facts. yeah hope smells great as i drive along the freeway. 

 second surf, still no waves but the water is clean and fresh and with just enough cold to kick start the day. i love it. sun, blue skies, as i invoke neptune, gratitude, open and emanating. .

i've been experimenting with various cbd oils, mild to very strong, found a very strong one that suits me. it's so strange that such a plant is illegal, in my humble opinion all politicians should smoke or inject this holy herb although the current lot are brainwashed and already enslaved to their agendas. anyways what do i know, it's all an illusion, i should try to detach from these things,  politics ect. the fall will come and then the rise, that's the tidal flow of humanity, never really learning the patterns of history doomed to repeat it. i get more satisfaction, answers and joy from the sun, the moon, the stars and the oceans. oh. and girls.  

 the water looked so clean and inviting, i know it was cold but i figured what the hell and threw myself in. it was not as cold as i anticipated and immediately i acclimated, feeling the clear cool water overwhelm me, my energy centres activated and my whole body turned on. no waves but it was my first swim in a long time setting the pattern for the next few seasons. even though it was a short session this morning i had a taste and want more. after a colder shower i sat in the sun and dried, perfect, the sun blessed me with heat and good vibrations. everything begins now. 

it's market day on the coast, so i loiter down the road and peruse the crowded stalls, nibbling on organic mushrooms, apples, tasting samples and basically having a free breakfast. i talk to a cbd oil maker about our love of cannabis with thc, and we talk about the availability of various psychedelic mushrooms for clinical treatments.  i bump into a few locals and we exchange stories over coffee, i meet a guy who says he can get me a lions mane growing kit, i pick up some organic pumpkin, some spelt bread and some blueberry organic jam. that will do me as i head back home, all before 8am.

my plan was to head off to avoca markets but the sprinkle of rain makes me just wanna go home, light a fire and read however when i get home my motivation seems to leave and i slide into a strange state of inertia which i shake of by smoking a joint. there's a lot to do, as usual domestic issues take a lead. the joys of being alone means you are responsible for everything, down to taking out garbage to shopping, paying bills, laundry and generally keeping yourself amused.

the shopping mall is a nightmare, i'm in and out, all i need is milk and to pick up something from the chemist. as usual at the chemist there's an issue with my account. fucking heart medicine! 
ever since my jab the pharmaceutical model has invaded my space, it's been awful and the war is on many fronts. fighting with doctors, chemists and the medication itself. i would love to be free from their tendrils. 
when i finally get home around 11am i get a message to meet at a friends for lunch, well that sounds nice, at least i can practice my social skills. 

spring is weeks away, soon i will return to neptune. my mission is to surf everyday until the water gets to cold sometimes midway through next year. i will continue my training but this will supplement the HIT i am doing.

this morning i watched the surf, it was wild and unruly, chaos and not very friendly at all. the actual weather was amazing, very warm, blue skies and almost like spring had arrived. i couldn't believe how warm it was as i sat in the sun, reading my hp lovecraft themed book, 'the abyssal plain.' 

plato said 'faulty thinking brings misery,' and nowhere do you see this clearer than in kamila harris who made a ridiculous speech yesterday about price gouging and the govt. control of price commodities. i know, she's your fave but seriously, anyone can really see she is an idiot. her party are obviously dumb and prove themselves incompetent and corrupt. these people do not represent normal people.

the idea of the communist method of correcting the economy would apply if humans were ants. it's very chinese. but humans are unique individuals, and the market controls prices via supply and demand. the fact four years ago everything was cheaper says a lot about her party, they have been in power and certainly could control the economics, but they chose to print more money thus creating the inflation which drives up prices. it's freaking obvious and you don't need to be an economics student to know this.

the other crazy thing she said, i know there's heaps to choose from but this slipped under the radar was her policy about giving new homeowners an incentive of $30000 to invest in a new home. lovely idea in theory but the reality is, sellers just increase the value of their homes by $30000. 

i've attempted to be impartial and make clear objective decisions about her but the verdict is in, she's stupid and that makes her dangerous. trump at least has a sense of humor and despite media reports, is very intelligent. he just doesn't dress it up in bullshit newspeak. yep, he's no slick talker but he's my main man in the political game.

in the evening i do some clandestine stuff with a group of people, i was asked to talk to. wow, it was amazing, meeting switched on people who know what's going down. they also know how to navigate it so my learning curve is growing. 

it's unusual for me to read female writers, i'm usually disappointed by most of them, possibly as they write like females and it's obvious whereas silva moreno garcia is blowing my mind with her dark tale of two friends in 90's mexico city who come across a old washed up horror film director and a story about a possessed film that was left unfinished financed by a nazi occultist. 

here's a writer that knows it's horror movies, knows the occult and it's weird practitioners, here's a writer who develops real characters, flawed and believable. silvia has written an extraordinary book. it's riveting and filled with homage to a  sub genre of film history. 

the only criticism is the magick system at work within it needed more development although the magick is accurate in most parts there's a degree of fiction which was unnecessary. i guess i don't think of magick as electrical energy although the analogy has been made before.

all things settle, an equilibrium presides within my self. 

there is no self, i hear you say. 

in my selves then. 

i walked through the graveyard and watch the shadows, i wander through metal sculptures, i meander through the clock faces of when and i divine the peace within the peace within.

 

boxing this morning, i break through more barriers and boundaries, i learn how to move on my feet, i get it but it takes a little time, all the injuries and glitches in my alignment are being repaired, i'm getting flow again. it's been a long time since i have felt this fluid. there are so many components to boxing, breathing, posture, movement, of the hips, feet and fists, power, speed and elasticity. over the last few sessions i have learnt how to breathe, adaptation is the key, changing rhythm and being aware of opportunity. pushing air deep inside, releasing in precision with impact. then there's posture. i am learning about stance, elegance and coordination, it's resulting power, how to jab, cross, upper, hook like a machine. i finish and walk out feeling stronger, lighter and physically a much better version of myself. i'm really looking forwards to a slight rise in ocean temperature when i can start surfing again, combined with boxing i'll be on top of my game. 

 i pop in for dinner at some friends, andrew and monique, they have invited me over to their groovy pad the next beach along. i have been there once during the daylight a week ago, to pick up firewood. but at night google maps has misdirected me, i'm close but driving around through very narrow side streets in the pouring rain. eventually i get there, two minites late. i didn't know what to bring, wine or weed so i brought both. 

now this is a very cool home, it's multileveled in the bush, overlooking a panoramic view of avoca. the ouse is perfect, huge great big rooms, adorned with large art pieces and sculptures, there's a lot of space and a huge balcony. 

we grab some umbrellas and have a bbq in the rain. well we actually just cook food on the bbq, we eat it around a very elegant table where we swap stories. politics, art, ufo's and aliens, shamanics and law. it's a fantastic evening, i can feel the hash cookie i'd taken this afternoon kicking in, and i only licked the spoon, not even had a bite. this is a fresh batch and i think they will be very good, however i have to test them. 

we listen to some live jazz in the lounge room, yeah live. and then we have affragattos.

the food was perfect, i loved it all. what a gorgeous feast, and gorgeous company. these people are very cool, and they have done a great job raising their very talented and sound kids. 

i drive home, it's still raining, the foggy roads, the headlamps hit the wild bush, it shimmers and pulses with life and vitality after rain, and i see everything is alive and growing, nature is winning here, it feeds my soul and makes me happy.

my training seems to be kicking through some boundaries, self imposed limits i put on my physicality and how hard i train. now i seem to smash through pain thresholds easy enough, my body is aligning, those old hips swinging all the breakages and fractures are melding in as normal and strengthening my skeleton,  my punches are powerful and fast, i train hard. this in turn effects diet which is now pretty healthy and nutrition based, kinda functional. my sleeping patterns are erratic but i get enough sleep to repair damage to tissue and restore my needs. my mind is sharpening again. is this healing? i dunno, it's whatever it is. 

 i was reading a book and came across this very nice description of a labyrinth.
years ago i studied labyrinths and understood them in an intuitive level but never did i come across a description as eloquent as this.

a labyrinth is not a maze, it is a journey. you begin by facing your desire, whether it is to find yourself, jerusalem, or enlightenment, and you follow a path of knowledge. once committed you cannot leave that path. sometimes it is direct and your destination is clear before you. at other times it leads you to the side, and this is a time for reflection and discovery of wider perspectives. sometimes that is a dark night of the soul, a time of severe testing when you closest companion is despair. but always the path of the labyrinth turns again. it approaches the point from which you began, but it is a new point and a new departure. and eventually by being persistent you will find your way to your hearts desire.

 

 

I asked my father I said, Father change my name The one I'm using now it's covered up With fear and filth and cowardice and shame Yes and lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover come back to me Yes and lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover come back to me Back to me, back to me He said, I locked you in this body I meant it as a kind of trial You can use it as a weapon Or to make some woman smile Yes and lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover come back to me Yes and lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover come back to me Then let me start again, I cried Let me start again I want a face that's fair this time I want a spirit that is calm Like the spirit of this song May it rise up pure and free Let it be a shield for you A shield against the enemy Yes and lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover come back to me Yes and lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover come back to me Yes and lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover come back to me Yes and lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover come back to me Yes and lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover come back to me Yes and lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover come back to me Yes and lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover come back to me Yes and lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover, lover come back to me