it's a strange old life when you are half dead and laying down with a life support machine keeping your heart beating. a strange array of screens and monitors display technicalities of the heart but all you feel is life, slipping away.
the heart, a blob of muscle acting like a pump, an electrical impulse reaching out into the cosmos, finding my son. we are connected. 
that's all that matters.

a few months later we are together again. i'm surfing, laughing, eating exotic salads, driving through strange coastal villages and cleaning up the debris that is mission control. jake manages to clear away two rooms so i can see the floor and actually walk across it. i'm still looking at a very messy dining table and kitchen but that can come later. right now i am happy to be alive, breathing and sharing with jake. he's a smart guy with a very big heart. i'm hoping he packs in the glam life now and just comes home, but it's something i can't expect him to do, after all he has a dream job travelling around the world, the high class lifestyle, the best of all, the famous, the money, the parties but deep down i know he will return. if not soon, then within a couple of years. he knows what i know.

i drive home from work late, the whole new years thing is kinda lost, a strange random day where time is at some sort of imaginary nexus based upon the roman colander whereas i am a lunar calendar guy. however i respect those romans and what they left us, aqueducts, walls,  fresco's and some spiffy architecture. everywhere i travel i see signs of their empire, except here in australia. 

my heart is affected by my lungs, it's obviously the vaccine, as it's spike protein sets it's controls to the heart of the sun. me. i am lucky i took the detox and the alternative treatments to minimise the effect but none the less, i took a bullet. my cough returns, we really need to fix that. i have just over a month before the electro shock treatment, maybe that will put an end to it all. i gotta write a will. that really is a priority. 

i munch down a new years hash cake, a small one just to celebrate the occasion. ha! not really, i just love em. 

i can't sleep, the night before i had taken a melatonin. it's prescribed by my heart specialist, slow release. completely different from the stuff you buy in health shops, this is the real deal. wow! i fell into the best sleep i have had in months but tonight without one i can't switch off. 

the morning greets me with a grin. it's the first day of the new year and i feel worn out already, exhausted and in need of a few days away somewhere hot and beachy, somewhere where i can drink coconut drinks and eat fresh fruit while girls in bikinis rub stuff into my body to make all the aches and age related pains vanish. maybe if they rub it in deep i will vanish, like a vanishing man. 

what's this year going to be like people ask me.

it's going to be nuts, even crazier than the last year. baton down yer hatches, stock up on protein pills and coconuts. charge up your psi power and plug into the cosmos because this year is going to be a wild ride into man made chaos. if aliens are going to land, 2024 is the year. let's hope they can pull us out of the vortex we are being sucked into.

this year i will be doing some work with an entity known as hekate, it appears she has entered my world and is awaiting some sort of invocation. the process may take about 7 months but i have everything i need, it really is a matter of commitment.