early morning i discover the zone near the south end of a remote beach, some interesting people come my way, all wish to speak for some reason, me i just mind my business, 'leave me alone' vibe not working so i talk to them. the sun drenched water is beautiful, i feel the sunlight upon my skin and do some bone breathing, light eating. i'm blocked, energy not flowing anymore but i am in a zen space and it feels okay. hope it can stick around.
i gotta lot of stuff i need to sort through, my blocked energy, my broken heart, guilt, remorse, fucking self worth, i gotta get myself sorted out fast and the only way is go deeper in and fix my own damage. my white light has a leak. my black light has a knot. i saw a fucking great black dragon tattoo this morning in a shop at long jetty. it was awesome. i'm not sure if i can get that tattoo now, i need to do that in consultation but i would like something soon maybe in june when i am consistent and back from the dead.
we did speak briefly, she the clockwork binary universe, me, i see it as a vast intelligent organism constructed from spiritual material that has no analogue or digital dualistic quality, only the illusion of one. i do know this, not from study but from experience.  the raw and real is even an illusion, it all is except love. the only thing that matters is the soul and mine is half beautiful the other slightly wounded.  
i'm going so far inwards i can't say what will appear on the out.
let's make it sexy again.
i stop at some strange yoga place and ask this crazy girl to make me something healthy and nutrition packed, she fixes me the most glorious green drink ever. it's absorbed by grateful cells who dance around like james brown, the girl looks at me in bemusement as i can't stop thanking her and she asks if i want to stay and have lunch. 
'no, i can't,' i say, 'i have to keep dissolving.'
she smiles, 'cool,' she replies.
i think she gets it.