on the verge of hitting 51 years old, my body is beginning to decline rapidly as old wounds come back to haunt me, my eyes fail and my appears hearing shot to pieces. the doctor reckons i am in good shape, having the same health as a 40 year old except for some weight i have packed on, he seems to think i should consider myself lucky.
well i can still write, that's the advantage, i am breathing and i live in a good spot, so yeah i am lucky, lot's of gratitude there.
when i wander out of the docs into the hub of the shopping mall i am disorientated by the crowds, the shops just confuse me, i consider a doctors surgery in a shopping mall the height of bad taste but i require a sick certificate, so environmental concerns have to be prioritised as low. it's bizarre that i only ever go to the doctor for a sick certificate, so i can get off work, but i guess when you hit 51 it's probably a good idea to find a doctor you can trust. 
i never think about age, never consider it anything but a process and number, one mans 51 is another mans 17, it's all about the process, depletion or restoration. 
so i file out into the horde.
the mall where i live is sprawled out over a large area, it's single story and has hundreds and hundreds of shops, a lot of which sell sunglasses. i decide i will investigate and find myself a new pair of round glasses, john lennon style, as these are my preferred shape, large round circle lenses, with a narrow thin frame. 
not surprisingly the sales assistants bring out everything they have but round lenses. i reject them all, in about 12 different shops i go through the ritual of explaining a circle and why the glasses they bring me are not circles, 'no that's an oval, sorry that's what i would call a rectangle, err nope.'
on it goes until i start to feel different, am i the one who is wrong, did the scientific community who decided pluto is no longer a planet also later as an afterthought declare circles no longer have to have a consistent radius. 
these days staying home, reading, writing and feeding the animals is safer for me, the world has become very confusing and awkward for me, it's melted away from my mind, i am truly detached from it all, yet able to navigate my way through should i chose. it's a snake pit of greedy people chasing down money, that's basically the experience of society in the modern age.
the desire for cash is growing, you can see it everywhere as the governments all over the world suck cash from the tax payers, and like sheep we pay them their fines penalties and royalties, yet the tax we pay should come back in the manifestation of better services and facilities. my point is where is the service? for all the cash the public hands over where is the actual service we fund?
it's being spent by a bureaucracy on a bureaucracy, that's the bottom line. the health service get's worse at a ground level although the committees that run them rake in the clams, transport services in sydney are 20 years behind the rest of the world, education now dumbs people down so they don't know what a circle is. and if you don't believe me, wait till you pay your rates, because they are going up about 60% in the next few years, which means rents will increase to. 
yeah the local councils have agendas to. 
yeah i need glasses now to read but i see things very clearly.