apparently the moon is cancer, the nurturing mother energy. this explains why i wanna bake cakes and feed people i guess. it may explain why my friends is in hospital with cancer as well. she's my moon, the brightest star in my night on that lonely journey home, years of travelling up the m1, falling into micro-sleeps and exhausted from work, stressed out and frustrated, my lifeline on the end of the line as i follow the moon hanging above the road, the brightest moon in the sky always reminding me to phone the brightest star in my world as she would be awake, and happy to chat, to listen to my ramblings and nonsense, my stories of work wars, my girlfriend dramas. we would just talk and she would always wait until I made it home safe and sound. 

then there's another friend from my avalon years, she has been going through a massive crisis and i can't even get to see her or attend a funeral i really should make an appearance at. two agents, both going through their own stuff and i am helpless. 

it takes a lot to be an agent, someone who has gone beyond the limit of friendship and normal expectations, someone who was there for me and without question helped me face overwhelming odds. to be an agent required something special, a quality long missing from this world, it required proof. i love all the agents in my life. all two of them.