strange energy current flowed through my day yesterday as i tried to fill it doing pointless things, like going to the big shops, wandering around like some sort of zombie, mind blanked out on lack of sleep and stress but underneath i am processing deeply, it all happens on a deep level, so deep i don't even know what's going down. i'm a mess, a nervous wreck, i have no idea how tricky the future is for me there, but it may be my time is up. who knows, therefore anxiety plagues me. have to heal myself from some psychic wounding. up against bureaucracy, my arch enemy and some guy i happen to work with who won't do any work. 
i somehow transported myself from the shops to the gnostic spot a few suburbs down the line. i'm looking at a silver pentangle but it's a bit to small although i appreciate its elegance. i'm looking at a lapis lazuli set in a piece of jewellery. a silver ring. anyway looking at these beautiful stones i chat with the people behind the counter both very lovely ladies and mention to one, whom i have met several times before, that i once gave a talk upstairs once. anyway they get my number, and let me just confess i was happy to leave it, but bout 20 mins after leaving i get a phone call asking if i would come in tomorrow and hold another talk as the person they were expecting canceled. 
i asked what they wanted me to talk about and went through a lots of things i could successfully talk about while ad libbing it. it was not a long list granted but it was impressive to me as i have low expectations at the moment. what surprised me more was she chose the ayahuscia subject, and in reflection it's possibly the least transgressive of my interests although i could tone it all down a little. 
i had a coffee or two and walked into the place and spoke about ayahuscia and they asked brilliant questions and accepted everything  i said with a respect i could only say floored me. i sort of didn't make a big deal about the whole thing, i was just me telling my story with some edits and they were cool. some had even heard about it and one asked where she can go to have some. i enjoyed relating my story as it's changed a bit, it's a softer gentle one. 
as the marriage i have with, this goddess spirit of ayahuscia. it's like an old married couple, she's still with me. amazonian goddess spirit. makes sense right?
anyways' i thoroughly enjoyed the sharing and the listening, they were the brightest group of people i've seen for a while, switched on old people.