what can i say, post bondi, it was inevitable. switched on people knew it was going to happen, how could it not. for 2 years thousands of zombies marched through sydney saying 'globalise the infitatda'  and last sunday they got what they wanted right on their doorstep, i hope they feel happy and proud that they are responsible for these deaths. along with our current government which are really just a bunch of 6th formers who know nothing about the world as they never move outside their bubble of the abc and guardian cocoons along with the ridiculous mythological perspective on israel. these people are insane with hate, their brains infected with an ancient mind virus that blots them to logic, reason or any understanding. in the spiritual war against god, they chose the wrong team. ironically the death cult attacked on the festival of lights, a celebration of life and survival. i don't know what else to say. 

on a train filled with beautiful monsters i don't feel quite the freak, just an old gothic twilight vampire out on the streets of sydney with all the other concert goers. heavy rainfall all day but suddenly as i emerge at newtown the sun transforms the sky into orange and reddish hues, and summer saves the day. 

it's the second gig i will see of the singles tour in sydney at the encore, and it's a packed house again. i'm on the balcony in the middle, good vision, good sound, and a brilliant band. you probably know just how brilliant but this time i notice some tweaking in the songs that bring out the percussion and drumming, these small elements transform the energy of the songs and really work well. in the middle off tantalised there's a section where nick and tim beat out a tribal, almost talking heads rhythm and it's beautiful. perfecto.

on the way home i'm surrounded by beautiful monsters all excited about seeing their queen, all dressed up in freaky outfits. but me, i'm just smiling on a post gig high, feeling that energy cruise around in my plasma, happy.

 exhaustion, i think i am officially burnt out. 

i do feel physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually depleted, from a multitude of factors and various energies. the next few days i will be focusing upon healing but it seems like some motivation is required as my energy is very low, thankfully there's a church gig tonight. it's heavy rain fall. 

 

down at terrible beach at dusk, big fat full moon coming up over the ocean, crisp summer light casting glorious details over the ever shifting surf, a low flying eagle fly's past me carrying a big fish in it's talons, and behind me the wednesday night drummers ensemble are being to pound their skins, a jungle type rhythm,  full on tribal sounds, echoing through the sleepy suburb as girls hula hoop and dance, fire twirl and pirouete, one shakes her ass and gets down and funky. 

and as usual old captain mission is in the wrong place at the wrong time, somehow i'm designated to take her home as she lives quite far up the hill in an inaccessible part of the suburb. she's a cross between traumatised from something and somewhat drunk, she's constantly seeing reassurance and  because i have the constitution of a stoic asking if i am okay.

okay, she is attractive and very sexual, her energy is oozing out but she is also vulnerable and that makes her unpredictable so outside her place when she begs me to come inside i am declining, but my god she is persistent. she offers me a cup of tea and i agree,  but tea turns out into this big thing of wanting to make me dinner, then breakfast after a sleep, and somewhere in the madness i agree to watch a movie with her, but blankets and pillows are brought out, lights are switched off and she decides to remove most of her clothing. 

i keep my eyes on the screen and afterwards run for the door. deep down i know she is lonely and wants me to stay, i know she wants to look after me but to be honest my radar says danger danger and when i return home at midnight I know i made the right choice.

i have a rule, never sleep with anyone i've just met who is drunk or in an altered state, it's far to dangerous in this age.

the surf pounds along, beating out it's gentle rhythm, on crusty pristine sand i walk to greet the dawn, the gentle breeze comes in onshore as i kneel before neptune and raise my fin, blessed by the sun. it's neither cold nor warm, but comfortable enough to feel alive as i wade outwards. i love this part of the day. every morning, dawn ceremony. 

a small group of local ladies known as the friendly floaters swim out to the bouy known as goldie, and today i joined them, i didn't quite make it but got about 3/4 of the way there. giant rays swam by, apparently they are there every day, i just never go out that far. the women chat and take their time, it's funny, lots of laughter, lots of conversation, no competition. i may join them later in the pub when they celebrate their xmas party.

i picked up a new version of 'black and blue' from the rolling stones, i loved that album so hearing the new steve wilson mix is kinda exciting, i think the band had really peaked around now and every song is just drop dead brilliant. the piano playing is fucking brilliant. melody is my fave but they are all groovy funked out cuts.