the return of the sun
blue skies
bird song
the immaculate day
starts at dawn
bathed in photonic radiation
the dream dissolves
fade out into the fade in
i watch the play of light from the balcony
pansy sits beside me sleeping, his tail twitches
a bird flies down to the table, he looks at me.
a raven or a crow
i have always been a friend to ravens and crows
they are my spirit friends
i understand them and they me...
once a crow / raven flew into my window at mission control
he strutted around and then stopped by the sink for a drink.
i had some nice ambient music playing, burning some myrrh, i threw the bird a cracker. the raven crow sat with me and cocked his eye as if to say 'cheers' then he hopped up and flew out. it was a short visit and i didn't think to much of it until later that evening when i found note in the sink. it was damp and the ink had run but i could read the writing,
'please can you help us. we are in trouble and need the help of a human. follow the messenger and he will tell you what is required.'
yes that's what it said. i re read it and wandered out onto the balcony, and there in the moonlight was the mysterious bird, perched upon a railing.
'fucking hell man, are you retarded or something?' yeah right a talking bird, i thought. 'okay we don't have much time, so if you don't mind can we get moving.i'll fill you in on the way.'
sure enough the bird hopped along by my side as i walked with him. incredible, a talking crow, who had a lot to say, 'hey mission, roll me a spliff, how do you humans walk around like this, it's so boring and tedious, i knew a bird once that had a wing injury, she had to walk for a while, walking around is crazy, fish don't do it, its undignified, i'm a royal guard did you know that, that's like very cool in my kingdom, i serve the queen, she's a beautiful queen, nice wings and smart to, of course you have to be smart to be queen, hey are we going anywhere near kfc? i heard about that food, i never had it, i don't really like eating other birds but my friends say kfc is fucking the bees knees, i'm good friends with the queen she's sent me to get you personally, she wrote that note, pretty good hand writing huh? we have err what you would call a situation, a problem, actually it's really quite a difficult situation, yeah man it would be good to score some of that kfc, so the queen calls me over one night, she's in her tree, high up, i go immediately. i'm loyal. she's a bit embarrassed i can tell. but i'm very reassuring, i have a way, a good way with queens, they confide in me, it's my eyes and soft voice, should be a dj except i don't like music much, i like some but you know the classics, american easy listening and soft rock, cheesy songs especially if they are from the eighties.
so the queens wipes her tears, she says alberto, that's me. i'm alberto, she says, i have a terrible decision to make and it's tearing me apart. now i move a little closer, not to close cos i am respectful but a little closer than is necessary, i whisper in my reassuring voice, what ever it is we will solve it, i give you my word queen, as alberto a royal sentry and as a friend to your majesty, you see how i am, reassuring in a soft gentle non manipulative way. so she starts to tell me the terrible circumstance.'
on and on the raven crow went, endless tangents as his conversation wound around in knots and circles, spirals and loops, without actually telling me what the main issue was.
'zip it bird, if you are not going to get to the point then i will just go home.'
'tetchy human, if you had wings you'd be a lot more relaxed. anyway we are here now, the queen will tell you herself, i'm going for a shower, its a shame we never passed a kfc, next time maybe, maybe if you're not busy next week, perhaps we can go together, i've enjoyed talking to you, it would be pleasant to catch up again, don't you think, it's not something we do usually but the queen reckons you're cool, maybe i'll call over, say around, 9ish....we are here.'
i found myself standing at the base of a large tree in the park, it was two huge for me to climb, the branches started to high and the base, the circumference was just massive. i looked up at the trees silhouetted against the night. then the fluttering of wings and another raven crow sat upon my shoulder.
'oh captain mission, thank you for coming with alberto, and alberto, thank you for bringing the captain here, i am so grateful, you have been such a wonderful friend.
have you explained the situation?'
'err no your majesty, he was talking all the way here, i could get a word in.'
the queen spoke again, 'captain mission, our community has a noble task, i am not certain if you are aware that raven crows have a duty to both the living and death.'
'the dead, living and the dead you mean. death wouldn't be correct grammar.'
no captain, i'm sorry, i do mean the living and death. and right now death is not happy.
alberto muttered, 'no he never is, always wants more, greedy bastard. shame about that kfc, looking forwards to next week, maybe i can bring the queen, ooh that would be great.' he continued but i stopped listening to him and focused on the queen, i was getting restless.
'we are here on a mission, we assist the transmutation of energy as it leaves the body we assist it to move, it's an agreement we made with death, and the creator. the pact was made a long time ago by my ancestors but it has been honoured without fail. energy that has not been guided will get lost in transit and form disembodied spirits, who are wandering around lost and confused. you call them ghosts but they are really just essences, fields of energy that don't have anyway to get to where they need to go, like an echo. we have been guardians of this task for hundreds and thousands of years. very occasionally we will make allies with certain members of your species. it's very rare but it does happen.'
she flew from my left shoulder and disappeared behind the tree, reappearing only to sit upon my right shoulder.
'the issue we have is there are far to many of you. your population is out of control especially as it destroys our homelands and thus reduced our population. simply put your over crowded physical world will be over crowded with the echos, the ghosts of the people we cannot assist transit. ghosts captain mission, there will be a ghost explosion. already we are overwhelmed with the responsibility. i don't know how long we can sustain it.'
'so you want me to... er do what, stop the breeders, save the forest?
'well death will be here soon, wanting souls and we have not got enough, for death requires souls that have made good passage and as i said are overwhelmed, you will need to persuade death not to react badly, i fear death will be very angry.'
i sat down and wracked my mind for ideas, mmmm, i could play chess with death, after all ingmar burgman and woody allen did it however i was not a good chess player. games were out of the question, besides i couldn't see death being interested in games. he just needed his souls. suddenly a breeze hit my face, the queen made a cawing sound, and i could hear the chorus of other birds follow suit, she looked worried, 'death is coming.'
a figure, the classic cowl and clock, the hooded grim reaper standing tall, face in darkness we waited as the figure came closer. the hood fell away and surprise suprise, death was actually a woman, a georgous one at that, wow, actually she was stunning. we shared a moment and then i knew my stratagy. i would seduce death.
i stepped forwards, 'madame death, welcome to the kingdom of raven crows, it is indeed an honour. i am captain mission, friend of raven crows here to welcome you, and may i say i like what you have done to your hair...'
a blush, a flutter of eye lids, i was in....

up and down
through the rain
in various cars
on the highways
over bridges
through valleys
under tunnels
past trees and water
from the city
to the central coast
from the central coast
to the city
never stopping
to gaze in shop windows
never stopping for snacks
never stopping
to give way forwards
never stopping
to take way back

im very tired driving up and down but im on penalty rates and i have gigs to promote and overheads to meet. i'm sleepy and catch myself falling in between blinks, i roll the window down and turn on the air con, turn up the radio and listen to a discussion about the new super collider and the search for the bosun higgs. onwards we go on my mission, picking up my packages, dropping them of, i'm a people dealer on double time.
i get home and write a new song, five hours later i have the words, music and tweak the atmosphere, it's an interesting song, it has a nice luch ambient feel and the vocal delivery is different, more softer, more relaxed, a narrative. i work on this song for about 9 hours more, i'm lost in it, exploring the tones, the colours, it's a beautiful song. once i've done my work val will add to it, his genius will perfect it, like a sculpture, i offer the uncarved block, build the skeleton, add some organs, some flesh, a heart and mind but val, he gives it blood, vitality, brings it to life.

rain falls through the night, into the day, endless grey skies, watercolours run, dogs mope about, clothes get wet, the roads are empty, the people melancholy, the day fades into that english way, i am cast back to the hell i came from, bring me sunshine, im a tropical soul, the dampness makes my bones ache.

happy xmas to those that follow that kind of thing, happy festivus to those that don't, happy day to those that don't care, me i wake up xmas day, early, we walk down the road in the rain, my dog happy to be by my side, we walk past the closed doors and empty newport and empty avalon, we stroll like it's the day after the end of the world and there's nop one left, we are oblivious to significance, we are out of touch and free momentarily, until the texts start rolling in. i reply to as many as i can and then wander back to mission control where pan gets a huge lump of meat on a bone. when i write the word huge it doesn't actually justify how big this dead flesh is, it's like a large beast stripped naked with one bone running through it. pan looks at me in disbelief, 'fucking hell man,' he smirks, 'that's way cool. can i eat it, is there a catch?'
'eat' i say, eat drink and be merry and don't forget to dream.'
i send some love into the world, it's not much, i'm older and beaten down a bit, i'm jaded around the edges, frayed and a bit shell shocked from this year, each one brings something unexpected. but what love i have i send out to those that need it, those that don't, it's arbitrary and where it falls light will shine. shine on you crazy diamond, you hate me and despise me but it is wasted upon me. you have read me wrong, your signals are crossed and the code is uncracked, you have no authority on which to base your observations, you are just a reflection, as we all are.
i sit in peace, everything somewhat still and in these frozen moments i see angels.
yes you have aliens i have angels, they are the same thing, mine are ancient and from the old testament, yours seem slightly more contemporary. they have left their mark on us either way. psychic imprints.
i pass the day and in the afternoon i call in on a friend. we go and see avitar again, she is immpressed. i tell her a little about aya, she asks me to leave, i drive home in the rain, back home, back to where i started.

time drips like a cave with natural plumbing issues, as my day is spent in a haze of tired exhaustion, to tired to even make it to the beach, the shop or the mailbox. i kill time today like a blue vishnu, my hands squeezing the seconds minutes and hours from the day into a blender mixed with seasonal cherries and some chocolate soy and later i go to see evan and leanne and hear about leannes 10 vippashnia and then we decide to see avitar again, and avitar again is just as outstanding as the first time, my mind is blown by the colour and the images and the reality of pandora and there's some lines in that movie that made me laugh, one blue skinned native says to the earthman as she agrees to let him stay in their tribe,'let's see if we can cure you of your ignorance.'

spending the night with a spartan amazonian greek goddess has left me jaded and feeling kinda wobbly, she fed me exotic triangles, while sade played in the background, she listened to my ravings and ramblings and asked me questions while my imagination played havoc with me. dressed in her librarian outfit i was somewhat at a disadvantage. it was a nice night.
i arrived home at 5am.

tom petty haunts my soundtrack, 'free falling', on the radio, in shops, on the tv, it's everywhere and i'm not sure why.
anyway i quite like it, i know it's terribly uncool but it's sentiment i quite like. i rather that song than 'still have not found what i am looking for' which haunted me for many years. nope, 'freefalling'is freedom and 'haven't found what i'm looking for,' is entrapment.
anyways enough nonsense.

i have seen the best movie ever (apart from dead man) and it's in 3D. AVITAR.
AVITAR is an ayahuscia movie. In fact the subtext is pure aya, actually not just the subtext but the whole fucking film. The planet pandora centeres around one huge tree, called...the tree of souls. Described as the interface between the central nervous system of the planet and the individual, it offers healing, conversation with the dead, insight and wisdom, sounds familiar. it's a brilliant movie with, space ships, sexy aliens, giant robots and dinosuars. but the whole plot is a message that is very fundamental yet easily overlooked. we live on pandora.

deep in the bowels of the sound basement a ritual is conducted as val and i raise the fallen angel know as lucifer, candles are lit, invocations made, val mutters the secret names while i create a physic force field and cast the banishing ritual. val tweaks and twiddles his multi dimensional sonic generator while i stand alone in a large room with a mike and the original light bringer manifests himself in a swirl of black smoke and ambient electrical energy that shrieks across the room in a blue white light blast..
my demo recordings of snuff music are transformed as we re do vocals and add various ideas to the framework. there's a few glitches, a kink in the matrix, a ghost in the machine, a spirit in the material world as some departing spirits from the mortuary next door enter our domain but they are frightened away by our guest.

yes snuff music is being born

my dear friend who i have not seen in 25 years has become something of great english spiritual teacher, his letters to me are quite remarkable and apart from being a great musician he has been very encouraging. i recently learnt that he has a new website that offers sound advice for those with philosophical or enquiring minds, those who are looking for the definitive truth. i would like to share this with you here if you are such minded. just go to
terryfulcher.com
and all will be revealed.

sadly i have cut up my finger with a fishing knife, sliced into the flesh, blood spurting out all over the place like a christmas fountain, therefore typing is quite tricky and blogging will be short and sweet today.
i have however started on the second snuff song. snuff is coming.

as they dragged me from the wreckage, i was dosed up with some weird narcotic painkiller, a woman in a white coat took my readings and they sent in a team of neurologists to assist with my brain. i was off course fully conscious.
i was still in the lab, surrounded by debris, a particle accelerator was operational and i could see a tachyon array beginning to form a field around the general area. excellent i thought, focusing my telekinetic abilities upon the computer system. the chip boards were fried in my hard drives but my wet-ware was working with the predictable reliability i had come to expect from all things from the amazon, the calculations were coming together, i could see the ever changing algebra flickering along in small data flow flashes. the neurologists looked nervous as they went into conference, i could hear the detectives organise a forensic team, they would be to late, they would never find any evidence here, neither would they really ever fully understand what i had done, they would be searching through the rubble and ruins for years but all the hard stuff was now floating around my brain getting ready to exit and that was not easily assessable. even a neuron hack would have to deal with the super firewall i had built in for protection. i had covered all bases. it would take them a week to realize the argumented wet-ware in my neo cortex and frontal lobe.
in a few moments my consciousness would be uploaded to a satellite via a light beam travelling through an 8 dimensional vortex i had opened. they would be left holding the body, a husk, a shell that i no longer needed. my brain would stop firing synaptic responses as the wet-ware dissolved leaving no trace.
i could feel my gateways closing, brain shutting down, suddenly chunks of memory disappeared, ability faded and all that would be left is a drooling and dribbling body. it had served me well but i had out grown the idea of being trapped in one unit.
i felt a surge upwards, out from my body, i could see some kinda white light, a sense of vertigo and suddenly i was everywhere.

high above the atmosphere i ( if such a term now applied) was stored in the satellite yet my consciousness was everywhere, i could focus it anywhere i wanted, like a beam. i narrowed the field, honing in upon the ruined lab, the neuron team were in dismay, they were baffled to why my lights went out so fast, the doctor looked defeated and sad and i could see the forensic team interviewing them and asking questions. i could focus further and be in their mind. i could feel what they felt and influence it. i flickered through them, surfing their neo cortex, i made one of them fall in love with another, i made the detective consider a sex change and i picked up a terrible secret from one of the forensic boys, he was a serial killer. i made him confess and then retreated my consciousness towards the problem at hand, namely the earth below.
in a few seconds a beam would open and i would find myself n direct communication with the entity known as gaia.

im a fat fuck filled with some experimental lentil meal and passion fruit and lemon desert made by my friends evan and leanne, strong wine swirls through my body straight to my head. we are all on the love boat, evan and leanne take a stroll along the deck watching an enchanting sunset while i am sneaking into the room of one of the can can girls, we fuck like it's the end of the world, while outside a giant tentacle arises from the ocean and starts taking innocent tourists, it's a cruise, right?
i tell evan about my walking in on the paranormal romance book club, about 15 young girls eating cheese and wine, discussing this new genre of writing. i've seen the titles, a sort of mills and boon version of steven king, terrible stories of love between skool girls and vampires, girls love this stuff at the moment.
they ask me to join them.
'have you ever read any paranormal romance.'
'no. i don't need to, i've had many paranormal relationships.'
the girls laugh and i get the look from a lovely lady with an eastern european accent but they don't realise i am serious. i laugh to myself.
evan talks about a time he and a friend attended a talk on angels and the speaker started the talk with the words, 'everything is everything.'
ha!
desperate people will believe any thing, even a scientists report that says the earth is warming and a tax will solve it. leaked e mails indicate the fraud but again there is no media coverage of this, nothing, it's all under the radar. people are sheep, desperate zombies, the world is run by bankers and strange occult groups they say, that's why i can't be responsible for anything, what a jip!
'a race of lizards run earth' they scream 'david icke wrote it in a book,' so it must be true.
these people are the so called new socialist class, always looking for a reason why they can't take responsibility for themselves. i dislike and distrust this in people. i'm immensely misanthropic. sure capitalism is bad, it's crap but it's the best system we have come up with at the moment, just like democracy. the only problem with these concept's is we don't follow them to their ideals. the ideal of capitalism would ensure resources are not depleted and the environment is sustainable.


it's a week of revolution, revolution within the libs, revolution within the labs, but it's the same old crap, over and over there is no escape from the cycle of political hyperbole, everything will collapse soon and we will see true chaos. it's almost time, the jungles will eat the city, the animal kingdom will reign supreme, nature will rise, man will fall, time will cease and herald peace. hark, i hear the sound of trumpets.

all day i spent with a massive head ache, i couldn't do anything but sit in a dark room and close my eyes. it was not until the sun set that i couild venture out from my room, maybe i am a vampyre after all.

you go dancing in the night clubs
because you no the dj
kiss a multitude of strangers
that's the price that you paid
to loose yourself in drugs
made mine a dark white russian
just to feel good in your absence
as the blood starts rushing

cover up your feelings
don't let down your mask
keep yourself together
just don't break your heart

you go back to the safety
of an ex lover
he may have been abusive to you
but he gets on with your mother
block out your emotions
i dare you to feel true love
as you slide down the spiral
wave as i rise up

it hurts to see us broken
it hurts to see us part
but that hurt compares to nothing
now i've got a broken heart

so keep your candle burning
and a smile on your face
you left me in the shadows
now i'm drowning in your wake
you remove me from existance
and i will cease to be
just a shadow of your ex love ex
wiped from memory

i'll howl at the full moon
about the words you've spoken
but there's nothing that can fix my heart
becuase it's broken.

yeah heart broken
who's loving you now.

here we are, a day off, and around me noise, the hammers of suburbia, the lawnmowers and electric drills, the horrific chain saw assault upon my morning peace, the hum of skool kids and the sound of the neighbors dog barking incessantly. i have to escape somewhere. find some slice of peace, it's been like this for weeks. the only peace i get is when i go to work.
throbbing head, neo cortex under attack, i slouch away, like a vampyer avoiding light, i avoid discordant noise. the shadows and the darkness of silence are my domain today.
outside the wind blows change, tony abbott is now leader of the opposition, the climate debate heats up, islam is rising, the west is fallen, the amazon is being cut, the gods look down unfavorably and our souls are cast into turmoil, all people really want is a little control over their own lives. i'm so bored with political debates, left right, it's the same old bird, and it's a turkey, i'm bored with the arguments, it's time for something refreshing, everyone in the political world is wrong, they stand for lies and narcissistic motive.t he sound bytes are tedious and induce nausea, the left wing are worse than the right, in fact the left is the right wing now. it's time to scrap the system, it has failed us.
so how to replace it, repair it?
firstly i think we need to stop the religious influence that seems to penetrate politics, separate the state from the church totally, then we need to stop the breeding of humans. bring the population down to sustainable levels and then totally put an end to the lunacy of aggressive destructive memes. the only memes that will be able to thrive are individual responsibility and freedom of expression, perhaps thelma can be used as it really does offer people a sense of personal freedom. know your will and serve it.
i will become the worlds first benevolent dictator, humanity will follow my word. no more meat is to be killed as industry, no more weapons, those that have them will have them turned against themselves. no more cars unless they are environmentally friendly, air ship will replace airplane. plastics will be banned as will the harm inflicted upon trees. humanity will no longer have borders and people are free to live where they wish, work will be as is now although with a more environmentally harmonious nature, food will be rationed equally to everyone, no one will starve. there will be plant medicine and no pharmaceuticals, there will be education that is based upon individuals talents and strengths, nurturing of these skills is important.
sports will be banned but arts will be encouraged. technology will be used in harmony with nature, the only exception being my personal space program, where we will consider travel across the galaxies a goal for all humanity.
this will unite us as a species and offer us a vision of achievement.
the earth army would be harnessed to assist people in trouble, earthquake victims, sea rescues etc.