im watching the moon rise over the horizon, there's no sign of it at all so i check my i phone ap and see it rises at 2033 so gravy asks me what the time is now, 2033 i say and sure enough there rises the moon. we are watching the moon rise smoking a spliff, talking about geometry of nature and man, angles, triangles, strange portals and rips in the fabric, the veil. it's a strange mysterious evening, esoteria leaks into our spirits. we drive up to pete who has some very large san pedro plants, we smoke more spliffs, i get a call from jake, distressed. i hope i put him at ease. on return to gravy's i see some of his talent, creative genius, he's the man that supports other people become famous from his ideas, he is a total freak in the best sense of the word. i am very lucky to know such people, im surrounded by brilliant people who have excelled in a curious way people who share a similar understanding of the cosmos.

the deep fix rehearse, lots of procrastination, we do an excellent 'no way back' and then make the fatal decision we need to eat and drink, my brother arrives with a camera, we sit around, nevin plays a scorching guitar, he's like the silent one, generating he right noise when he needs to, a restrained pulse and then, he explodes into something quite unique and fades back to the tone, drone. its harmonics.
loius has brought a new instrument, it's a bass clarinet. it looks like a saxophone but loius explains the difference between wood and brass. who would have thought it was that simple.
loius and i talk about constraining the sax sound, and i explain my ideas, although i cannot use musical terms to explain them, however he is receptive. this is good. the sound does sound better, more disciplined. it's actually quite good except for the fact food has not arrived.
nevin gives me an interesting thought, about challenge. val is exhausted, i can see it in his swagger. the rest of the set is pretty average, i think we were just not energised, yet here i am in a room with 'the deep fix' and i wouldn't trade places with anyone. the individuals are exceptional in every way, brilliant thinkers, musicians, and people. i have learnt an incredible amount from them, and the deep fix would not be if it was not for their input and contribution. i owe to them to learn my words and be the best i can be on the night.
martin and i drive back through the city. i drop him of at central and hen i head back to avalon, it's about 2am by the time i get home. i walk the dog, read a page or to from a book and then fall into the abyss.

mission control was dismantled yesterday, cables and equipment strewn all over the place, recording gear, computers, keyboards, and effects and stuff as i crawled about attempting to reconfigure everything, after about 7 hours i had a shower and started putting it all back together. then i smoked a spliff and went over to my friend gravy and watched the ocean. we ended up going to the movies to watch 'up in the air' quite a quirky little movie with george clooney as a kinda defeated giy holding on to what he thinks is right. it's okay. great editing.

here we are, the place where coincidence meet, chance encounters and the significant is found only by intuition. here we are in the cross hairs of the snipers rifle, running on instinct and intuition.
there's no escape when you know the signs, read the symbols, the inarticulate speech of the heart.
do you see? science cannot reduce this to genes. the fingerprints of a god. work in many dimensions. the double helix must be unravelled.

i knew a witch once, yeah a fucking witch, she had a broom stick a black cat and dressed in black as well, she was a sacred whore of babylon, she was voluptuous and off the moon, she was very intelligent and obviously mad. we slept in her small stone cottage up on the hill, in her wrought iron bed, we lived in the night, i would see her laying on top of me her hair blowing in the breeze and her soft luminous skin glowing, in the background the stars. we played loud music and smoked a lot of grass., she had a tv tuned in to static, where she would get her messages. yes this is true, why would i lie. her brother was dying and she was getting messages from somewhere in the static, so after a serious bout of wild and passionate sex i would fall asleep or read and she would sit in-between her speakers and listen to the static messages. then she would return and we would sleep.
one night she woke me up, telling me she had some information. 'we have to unravel the dna. that will cure him.'

many years later i sometimes think about that and vikki high priestess of la lune. i think she and her static were actually on to something.

australia day to some invasion day to others, just another day to me, a hot one as people swarm to beaches for a slab of meat and a beer, now would be a good time to launch the attack on the stupid people, a cull, trim the population save the planet.
australia day. wow, it amazes me how a population has so much pride in its country, something like this would never happen in england. hordes of families with flags and australian tattoos marching around, parks with concerts and people parading around in animal costumes, its quite strange. i used to go along to survival day but since the apology i don't go and i don't have much to do with protests these days. what do i have to protest about?
i live in a great place, have a great job, make music with brilliant friends and take great medicine. man i'm happy.
what about the whales, the poor, the haitians i hear you say.
well i cannot save the world brothers and sisters. i spent a great deal of my life trying to save people, it's a stupid industry.
anyways australia day, is a very strange thing to witness.
mission control is hot, i walk in and sweat pours from my pores, it's so hot and stifling, even the roaches lay on their backs, exhausted and overwhelmed by this alien heat. my home is a greenhouse, only the plants thrive, my cactus are growing into monsters. they tower up almost touching the ceiling. outside i hear a bat, it lives in the tree outside, he swooped me last year, almost hit my head. we've come to an arrangement.

okay now i have almost finished 'the god part of the brain' and i'm conflicted. i think the science elements are spot on, there is a spiritual part of the brain, and it can be stimulated to simulate spiritual feelings, (but the brain can also be tricked into thinking eating an onion is like eating an apple, the onion is still an onion.)
it's not difficult to accept that, but what i have trouble with is the fact the author implies that this is somehow something that evolved from survival mechanisms, i don't fully believe that. sure the brain evolved but the survival mechanism comes from the future, not the past.
it's something we are evolving towards, a spiritual way of being. this will greatly increase our survival.
in fact the whole problem with his argument is he has taken spiritualism as something that is the opposite of science where as the two are very similar, both require discipline, laws, paradox and imagination. in fact it is the spiritual part of the brain that makes the quantum leaps in science, one cannot exist without the other. however his points on religious intrusion into spirituality are accurate.
he skims etheogens and reduces the experience down to chemical alteration of the brain but he makes no comments about the fact that scientists that use them have made massive breakthroughs, crick, watson spring to mind. i think that science operates within the frame work of the brain, it is logical and predictable, but spiritualism operated outside the confines of the brain, at some point the two will meet. there are many jewish, hindu, taoists physicists who reconcile their beliefs with science.

sweat everywhere, captain mission slides through the day, it's so hot shadows melt, even ice cream refuses to be frozen today the laws of physcics refuse to comply with the laws of nature, the people are in the water, towns are empty, shopping malls full of people wanting a break from the sun, like vampyres on a credit high, air conditioners are working overtime, it's an inferno. my skin is shrinking, my brain expands, the heat is unbearable and usually i love it hot, but this, this is just stiflling. i am bogged down in domestics and attempting to tidy up mission control, its a overwhelming task, i water my plants instead, i vacumn and move some paper about, it's to hot to think clearly, my ideas dissipate like steam. i drink four cherry smoothies, i drink 4 litres of water, i am still thirsty, i shower three times, i go to work where they have an air con. at last coolness abounds.

captain mission, on the brink of exhaustion, running out of energy, battery depleted, condition red, level 7, thermo nuclear meltdown imminent. i am crashed out, phone calls intrude. i stumble through house looking for source of intrusion, finding it i accept the call, while noticing i have missed several. mmm, it's my boss, im supposed to be at work and that was 3 hours ago.
i can't accept this, i was certain i was not working but there's a element of doubt at the back of my mind, i race in. thankfully no casualties but everyone is cool, everyone is calm and collected except me.
i return home for about three hours sleep, then i have to rent a suit for a funeral, my day is spent in church, it's strangely comforting, the peaceful nature of the singing and the strange images of cherubs and icons and aliens. i end up at the reception, listening to the eulogy, words are said, the deceased was a good man, a fighting man, who had principles and stood by them.
i talk to his wife and children, eat some cake and return to the city for rock and roll with the deep fix.
raucous noise, i can't hear anything, the songs do sound okay but i really want structure and discipline, people need to know their parts and with us less is more. the sax dominates, loius is a master, a musician of incredible skill and creativity, he plays sax like hendrix plays guitar, he is a maestro but it needs restraint i think. it needs a square that it fits into, lest we sound like a cosmic jazz band.
i need to learn my words, there is no escaping this.
i get home at 2am and am up at 7, heading into the city with my passport and paperwork. i race around city running from wynyard to central to circular quay on a wild bearucratic goose chase only to be told that i can do it all at my local post office.
i return home at 5 exhausted and depressed. i'm heading for a crash unless i get some cash, sleep and time.
but first i am going to smoke a big joint and listen to dead can dance.

swimming down in nudeport this morning, the surf was really huge and hard, the water warm and inviting, i enjoyed the temperature but started to get nervous as the rip sucked me along, my feet desperately paddling to stay in my comfort zone. i splashed around for an hour, marched home for breakfast. i have to attend a funeral in the next few days, i have this strange resistance to attending wearing a suit. i don't know why it has to be so sombre. i don't want you guys attending my funeral in a suit okay? come in board shorts and sarongs, wear flowered coloured t shirts and laugh. jesus, laugh hard.

matthew alpers book 'the god part of the brain' is frustrating me as he is presenting a very good case for the idea that the brain is hardwired for spirituality due to an evolutionary need to understand death. i'm two thirds of the way through and his argument is rigorous and he has good science supporting his case, however i'm still not convinced that the whole 'god' aspect exists within our brains. i think his essential argument is correct, our brains have developed a 'spiritual' dimension, religious beliefs do indeed exist as a framework to deal with mortality and the fear Incorporated within the idea of death. there is no doubt spiritual experiences can be stimulated by electrical impulse, and there is no doubt that this is an evolutionary essential but what he has so far failed to mention is reality it a reflection of the brain itself. if the mind perceives god or a spiritual intelligence then one will exist. the two realities are both real equally as they are not. the particle wave theory is observer based. one cannot say which came first, the chicken or the egg. sure we evolve and consciousness evolves, that's why moses saw a burning bush and jung saw an archtype, it's not the vision, it's not the spoke on the wheel, it's the central truth of reality that is important, many paths many masters, many lives but one truth. love. that's why non religious people, non spiritual people, totally rational, material people love their children, their pets and their partners. it's not a part of a brain mr. alper, it's the heart.
in the introduction he describes a bad trip and consequently being depressed for many years after, he says pharmaceuticals drugs helped him. an early investment in science i think.
the problem with using the brain to understand spirituality is like the quantum conundrum, you cannot measure it or observe it with the brain, it's the wrong instrument. like using a chopstick to slice and an egg.

here at mission control the lights are low, the candles are lit and incense burns softly (if such a thing is possible) i am about to drink a massive dose of ayahuscia.
i will file reports as i go through the night.
i'm feeling hot, flushes of heat and i hear nature outside over ride everything else, it's nature calling the night in. i've just written to my dad, i was terribly rude to him this afternoon on the phone and now i'm feeling guilty. anyway it was a good letter. i never felt close or open with my folks, they were very judgmental and had antiquated ideas about child rearing, my mum was very radical but not that loving, not in an unconditional way and not in a way that love should be demonstrated but they were products of their age as am i.
they did their best and at this stage in life i feel i can be open and honest with them, i made mistakes to, i was a terrible youth.
anyways im healing.

i recently felt the presence of alien beings intervening in my journey, they were very intrusive, sucking things from me, making incisions and placing things inside me. i was scared as this is outside the realms of my normal aya experience and although i worked my way through the procedure adopting a very relaxed attitude and an openness although at first i felt somewhat violated and angry, the following day i felt revitalized and very healthy. later i spoke with the high priestess (my friend who is the embodiment of ayahuscia) and she informed me that these events were actually healing although there can be malevolent procedures. she said that the aliens were not necessarily extra terrestrial but possibly inter dimensional. after some deep thinking i actually feel she is correct in this analysis. also my limited understanding of the events frame the event, therefore i use language my brain understands to describe what is occurring yet in actuality i may not have words to describe what occurred because it is beyond the realm of my understanding. the fact is i think when encountering these entities i have to approach them without fear and embrace them, weather they mean me harm or not.


after i took a dose, stated my intention of forgiveness and slipped into a very serene meditation, my body relaxed and my mind drifted along with the flow of images and thoughts, finally settling upon a very detailed and tactile experience of being eaten by worms. i was already in the death pose, and instantly my mind accepted what was occurring as a beautiful experience rather than negative. the worms engulfed my body, they were in constant motion, all around sliding through me and my body seemed to disintegrate or not actually be there. i gazed into the worms and they were now like ever changing fractals, flowers blooming and growing from me. it was quite astoundingly beautiful.
i will never look at a worm in the same way again.
later the high priestess explained that this was the worms eating my karma. it feels so right. i am truly blessed.

good morning ladies and gentlemen, this mornings sermon is about weighty matters that have been preying upon my mind, along with the universe, love, sex, magick and the esoteric i have been pondering the nature of breakfast, what is the perfect way to start the day food wise?
i believe for me i have experimented with all sorts of bizarre and traditional combinations but recently discovered the perfect first meal of the day. a decaf latte, with bruschetta.
while i assume you know how to make a latte here's the recipe for a bruchetta .

step 1 Ingredients
Bruschetta is made up of very simple flavors, and is therefore best if you make it with highest quality and freshest ingredients you can find. 2 lbs. fresh tomatoes (roma, whatever is in season is best) 1/2 fresh onion 4 cloves fresh garlic 1 bunch fresh basil …

step 2 Dice the tomatoes
Using a sharp knife, dice the tomatoes as small as you can. I try to aim for 1/4" cubes and try to mush or break the tomatoes as little as possible.

step 3 Chop the onion
Next, finely chop the onion and throw it into the bowl.**If you're opposed to using raw onions, you can also lightly saute the chopped onion in a frying pan with a little bit of olive oil, garlic, salt and pepper. It adds a sweeter deeper flavor to the bruschetta, and is an excellent variation

step 4 Chop the garlic
Next, chop the fresh garlic and add it onto the growing pile of deliciousness.

step 5 Add in fresh basil
Add in some fresh basil to taste. I'm using 3-4 large leaves here, but there's no "right" amount.

step 6 Olive oil, salt and pepper
Add in the extra virgin olive oil, sea salt, and fresh ground pepper and mix the ingredients thoroughly. If you've got the time, let the mixture setup for 30 minutes in the refrigerator, if you don't it's also delicious when eaten immediately.

step 7 Toast the bread
Cut 1/4" thick slices of fresh Italian bread or baguette and toast them.

step 8 Serve
Finally, pile as much of the bruschetta as possible onto the freshly toasted bread, serve, and enjoy!

and finally as a variation spread pesto on the toasted bread before piling on the mixture, mmm perfection.

in my experiences with visionary plants i have now fallen under the spell that religious experience specifically judaism is highly related to the ingestion of psychedelics. there is no doubt this is the case. the plant syrian rue grew in abundance in the middle east and it is possible that mushrooms were the israelites genesis into judaic thought. many ayahuscia users who are not jews experience visions of hebrew letters aflame (strangely i have not) plus the god element of the experience matches the old testament profile. the moral implications are incredible as aya also instructs us how to live and can present as angry and jealous, all knowing, and loving. no wonder authorities want to suppress religious roots, imagine the church acknowledging this. it would never happen.

Manna From Heaven
by Steve Kubby


There are a great many people who would never consider the use of visionary plants to be a spiritual experience. These people believe that spiritual experiences must come directly from God and that the use of visionary plants goes against the teachings of the Bible. Contrary to this notion, the Bible never explicitly prohibits the use of visionary plants or potions. What you will find however, is many curious references to a spiritual food sent down from heaven by God, called manna.
The Bible never tells us exactly what manna was and where it came from, but there are many Old Testament passages which describe its physical qualities and conditions associated with its appearance. The Bible's first reference to manna is in the Book of Exodus as the children of Israel are fleeing from Egypt and following Moses into the wilderness. After six weeks of wandering, they began complaining to Moses that they are tired and hungry. What happens next is truly extraordinary:

Then said the LORD unto Moses, Behold, I will vain bread from heaven for you; and the people shall go out and gather a certain rate every day, that I may prove them, whether they will walk in my law or no (16:4).
And when the dew that lay was gone up, behold, upon the face of the wilderness there lay a small round thing, as small as the hoar frost on the ground (16:14). And when the children of Israel saw if, they said one to another It is manna: for they wist not what it was. And Moses said unto them, This is the bread which the Lord hath given you to eat.

When I read this passage, I was struck by the fact that manna easily fits the description of psilocybe mushrooms. For one thing magic mushrooms are small and round, and since they sprout so rapidly they would seem to appear overnight, as if out of the sky. Also, anyone harvesting them would immediately notice that they turn blue where torn and had no roots, giving more reason to believe that the mushrooms were of celestial origin. Note that manna does not just fall from heaven, but instead it is described as coming with the frost and dew, during the wet seasons. These are the precise weather conditions for mushrooms to thrive. And finally, manna is described as a bread.
Although translations have obscured the intent of this passage, it seems to be a description of how to find and identify manna and distinguish it from other non-psychoactive (or possibly lethal) mushrooms. Look for the small round things which are like bread, come with the rain, and seem to have heavenly (bluish) coloring. Psilocybe mushrooms also sprout in tiny pin heads which branch out in all directions and bear a resemblance to hoar frost.

It is also interesting to note that Moses tells the children of Israel that manna comes directly from Heaven to test them on whether or not they will walk in God's law. Here is evidence that manna was endowed with unusual spiritual powers, like those of magic mushrooms. However, manna does not automatically confer spiritual power. Instead, it serves as a test. Magic mushrooms would provide visionary experiences that would certainly test all who ingested them. Moses also said that the manna is literally the "bread of the lord" which is remarkably similar to the literal Aztec name for psilocybe mushrooms, "flesh of the gods."

But how and why did the manna suddenly appear? Again referring to the Bible, it is clear that the children of Israel had journeyed to a land where there was dew in the morning. As a large, nomadic tribe, the Israelites brought a lot of cattle and sheep together in the area. That meant a great deal of manure. The change of climate from the arid lands of Egypt to the dewy climate of the wilderness created ideal conditions for the propagation and spread of psilocybe mushrooms in livestock dung.

In Exodus 12:19-20, we find more references to manna.

And Moses said, Let no man leave of it till the morning (16:19). Notwithstanding they harkened not unto Moses, but some of them left of it until the morning, and it bred worms and stank: and Moses was wroth with them (16:20). And they gathered it every morning, every man according to his eating. and when the sun waxed hot it melted...(16:21).
Anyone familiar with wild mushrooms knows that they go bad very quickly and shrivel up under the heat of the sun, exactly like manna.

It seems curious that Moses recognized the manna instantly when the children of Israel showed it to him. He knew that the manna would spoil if it was not picked and eaten in the morning. But how did Moses know about manna? Perhaps Moses knew about manna because he had already encountered the mushroom at the time he saw the burning bush. Referring to an earlier period of his life, we find that Moses:

...kept a flock of Jethro, his father in-law the priest of Midiam: and he led the flock to the back side of the desert, and came to the mountain of God, even to Horeb (3:1). And the angel of the LORD appeared unto him in a flame of fire out of the midst of a bush: and he looked, and behold, the bush burned with fire, and the bush was not consumed (3:2).
Had Moses eaten the sacred mushroom while camped at the mountain? Here again we can only speculate that manure from his flock and a change in climate had created the proper environment for the mushrooms to fruit. Perhaps Moses ingested the mushrooms purely by accident, or perhaps his father in law, who we know was also a priest, had introduced Moses to the mushroom. Archaeological evidence of psychedelic mushroom use in Biblical times is well documented by Terence McKenna, so it is reasonable to conclude that Moses could have had some experience with visionary mushrooms.1

Later, in Numbers 11:6-9, manna is again described in terms that are remarkably similar to magic mushrooms:

But now our soul is dried away: there is nothing at all, beside this manna, before our eyes. And the manna was as coriander seed, and the colour thereof as the colour of bdelliaum. And the people went about and gathered it, and ground it in mills, or beat it in a mortar and baked it in pans: and made cakes of it: and the taste of it was as the taste of fresh oil. And when the dew fell upon the camp in the night, the manna fell upon it.
Here we find manna described as before our eyes, having a neutral taste like fresh oil, and once again, the Bible mentions that manna appearing in the morning when the dew fell. The Old Testament even tells us what manna looks like, the manna was as coriander seed, and the colour thereof. When psilocybe mushrooms are dried, their range of colors is virtually identical to dried coriander seed. In both cases, with mushrooms and coriander seeds, we see great similarities in the texture, color, tones, contrasts and general visual appearance. The Children of Israel must have given great thought about how to transmit the appearance of manna so as to aid future generations who might encounter it. However, mushrooms were a mystery to the Hebrews and they were unable to predict where manna could be found. Little did they realize that the manure from their cattle was providing a means for the mushroom to find its way into their mountain campsites.

Notice that the manna was ground in mills or beat it in a mortar. That is odd because earlier we are told that manna was quite delicate and, then the sun wax hot, it melted. However, if manna was the psilocybe mushroom, then it was probably dried and then ground in order to be used for baking. In fact, dried magic mushrooms are quite hard. Grinding or crushing the dried mushroom and then baking with the powder would insure that the delicate psychoactive molecules retained their highest potency.

In the next passage, the Bible describes manna as having light tan color and texture like a wafer, certainly an accurate description of the color and texture of a dried psilocybe mushroom. We also learn that the taste of manna is no longer that of fresh oil but rather that of honey. According to McKenna's research, honey has long been used in Mexico as a preserve medium for psilocybin containing mushrooms. Perhaps the children of Israel had begun to mix honey with the manna to preserve its potency. We find that Moses announced that manna must be kept for future generations:

And the house of Israel called the name there of manna: and it was like coriander seed, white; and the taste of it was like wafers made with honey (l6:31). And Moses said, This is the thing which the LORD commandeth. Fill an omer of it to be kept for your generations: that they may see the bread where with I have fed you in the wilderness, when I brought you forth from the land of Egypt (16:32).
Again we are told to fill an omer with manna. But how much is a omer? Isaac Asimov, in his book on the Bible, concludes that an omer is about four liters, while the King James version of the Bible estimates an omer to be six pints. Psilocybe mushrooms are 92% water and only 8% remains when they are dried. Also, fresh mushroom take up a lot of space, due to their shape. So four liters of fresh magic mushrooms would yield less than a tenth of a liter, or about 1/4 cup of dried, powdered manna This corresponds closely with the amount of magic mushrooms required for a moderately strong dose when used for baking. This is important because it clearly shows that not only does manna have similar qualities to magic mushrooms, it also shows that it was also used in the same quantity as mushrooms. So manna matches psilocybe mushroom on both a qualitative and quantitative analysis providing a compelling argument that psilocybe mushrooms are in actuality "manna from Heaven."

Of course there are those who will remain eternally skeptical, but keep in mind that the description of manna given in the old testament bears an exact resemblance to mushrooms. Even if psilocybe mushrooms are not manna the similarities have indicated mushrooms as a possible candidate, and they certainly fit the bill for a "spiritual food". Unfortunately, when the Children of Israel finally reach the arid land of Canaan, the mysterious manna no longer appeared.

And the manna ceased on the morrow after they had eaten of the old corn of the land: neither had the children of Israel manna any more.
The children of Israel must have been deeply disappointed when they ran out of their sacred manna. We can see that they went to great lengths to preserve their knowledge about identifying and using manna The Old Testament contains detailed information about the color, texture, appearance, and relationship to dew, and the Old Testament even explains how manna is to be ground and then used in baking cakes. If the Israelites thought that manna was a magical event caused by God would they have bothered to note all the details about the identification of manna? What about the manna that Moses said must be put away for future generations? Turning to Hebrews 9:3-4 we find:

And after the second vail, the tabernacle which is called the Holiest of all: Which had the golden censer and the Ark of the Covenant overlaid round about with gold, wherein was the golden pot that had manna.
Here we learn that manna was to be kept in the Holiest of all, the Ark of the Covenant. Clearly, the manna was something of great spiritual power since the Hebrews treated it with such reverence and even went to such great lengths to see that manna be given to future generations. We must also consider the covenant that the Jewish people held with God which was celebrated through the act of circumcision. Why was this covenant with God associated with the removal of foreskin from infant males. Why not a tattoo, scar, article of clothing or jewelry? Perhaps the answer is that the circumcised penis bears a remarkable resemblance to psilocybe mushroom just before the partial veil has broken away from the mushroom caps and they are at their greatest potency. If the Ark of the Covenant was specifically built to store manna it is logical was also tied to manna through the ritual act of circumcision, which gave each Jewish male his own mushroom-like penis.

The discovery that manna was (and is) psilocybe mushrooms is not simply an issue of theological or academic debate. So great was the power conferred by manna, that this small band of wandering slaves were able to defeat all enemies who crossed their path even when confronted by armies that were bigger and better equipped. Jews, Christians and Moslems can all trace their roots to the children of Israel who ate manna for forty years and saw themselves as God's chosen people. Again, we are reminded of McKenna's thesis that those who ate psilocybe mushrooms had a survival advantage due to better visual acuity, heightened senses, better hunting skills, and for the children of Israel, better warrior skills. Manna gave the Hebrews their own covenant with God one that is even recognized today by Christians who believe that the Jews have already earned a special place as the Chosen People. Bible scholar Grant Jeffrey explains:

"The covenant which God made with Abraham and the kingdom promises to David, Solomon and all the prophets will be finally realized in the Millennial Kingdom... the Lord promised a new covenant with Ismel in which He would give them a new heart, forgiveness of sin, and the infilling of the Spirit to the renewed nation. This promised kingdom will provide the fulfillment of all the hopes and dreams of the Chosen People forever."3


What is the new covenant? It is the rediscovery of manna. Across the gulf of thousands of years the Bible transmits and accurate and detailed description of manna waiting for the time when the message can be decoded and manna can again fulfill its role as a celestial messenger. Manna was the basis of the Jewish covenant with God. Indeed, it is this covenant and the use of manna which has set the Jews apart as the Chosen People. The Bible is not the message, it only points the way. Manna is the holy sacrament that provides the means for God to "prove them, whether they will walk in my law, or no."

If manna is indeed the psilocybin mushroom, then this means that the Koran, Bible, and Torah were all inspired by psychedelically induced visions. The very foundations upon which these religions rest were derived from the mushroom experience. Moses and the children of Israel used the mushrooms as true sacraments to communicate with a Higher Power, also known as Allah, God and Yahweh. The discovery that manna is real and is available to us today means that like children of Israel we too can use manna to experience the joy, wisdom and spiritual renewal of the Chosen People.
Terence McKenna, Food of the Gods, (New York, Harper Collins) p. 84.
Terence McKenna, Food of the Gods, (New York, Harper Collins), p. 127.
Grant R. Jeffrey, Heaven the last Frontier, (New York; Bantam), p. 132

early morning swim, the waves are huge, and extra cold, i'm tossed around like a greek salad at an orgy. i'm three pages into the god part of the brain and already i have found several wrong assumptions. i can see why rationalist like to deny the existence of god, it's because they have always operated from the confines of their brain. now i'm not saying god is not in the brain either, the implicit and explicit are both connected. what i find amazing is these people have a very one dimensional and somewhat fundamental view of what god could be. maybe i just read to much sci fi or have taken to many mind expanding substances i must continue reading though to assertion if the book has any elements that i can agree with, it's a good stimulating challenge and i am sure that the writer will redeem themselves.
i've finished reading, 'memoirs of a geezer' jah wobbles interesting autobiography, the guy comes from the same part of london as i do, however he stayed there much longer and became part of the neighbor hood whereas i escaped as soon as i could walk.
the book is very honest, i actually liked his writing but was left slightly under-whelmed. his character assassinations are quite funny and enlightening, peter gabrial does not come off looking that good. i think jah wobble has stayed in that english class structure and looked through the world through that, it's hard not to in the uk but his working class roots shine through his writing. there's some interesting tales and information on his base playing. there's also a nice spiritual bent to his outlook that i enjoyed.

i was in an russian mig doing an inverted dive, the sky seemed below and above me rushed the earth, my cockpit instruments were spinning recklessly and a few red lights flashed before me. i could hear my breathing slow to a more regulated rhythm, panic left my blood and a gentle calm engulfed me. my thoughts were empty, it was pretty zen up here, far removed from everything, dying was always so peaceful and even in the violent wreckage lays it's anthisisis. i could see the yellow eject button, it lit up the panel before me in the most obvious of ways yet here i was in an ocean of calm, tranquility flooded my mind, it was beautiful and serene. i was at peace. there was no hunger or thirst, no desire or need. time suspended itself externally, yet internally i retrieved a memory from my childhood. my grandfather had bought me a huge ice cream, it was massive, and i was so happy sitting with him. we had spent the days looking at trains in wimbledon, i had seen a blue train and i was deliriously satisfied. then the ice cream. it was bliss. i recall it was a hot summers day and the ice cream was unexpected, my grandfather just spontaneously bought me the best ice cream in the world. i was already content and happy but this simple act had made me feel like i was the most loved person on the planet, it was a joy, it was my first intense experience of joy. all other moments would be held to that measure, subconsciously every ice cream i have ever had since was never as good, yet i always eat ice cream. my craving for it knew no bounds, right through my adult life until recently, i never really knew why i ate so much ice cream. there were years in my 20's where i basically lived on ice cream, it got to the point where my stomach could no longer digest food.
it became suddenly clear to me why. all because of a childhood experience. i smiled, the earth was beautiful, the way it gently curved, the way the clouds hung above it, the blue richness and those fractal land masses, vibrating with life. i smiled and pressed the eject.

ayahuscia is a super conscious intelligence, it scans you and gives you the information you need to know, it has incredible seductive tendencies, while operating on several dimensions, it reveals the universe, in vision and voice, in many languages and codes, in hieroglyphics and image, information is known, the cosmic landscapes are traversed, it enriches you and it nourishes you, then it sends you back into the world feeling better than you did ever before.
for me the greatest value is the fact it is not a meme, the ideology of it is, but the essence of it is not. and that's where i sit right now. reconciled. i do think that as far as memes go the ideology of ayahuscia is close to perfection. however like all ideologies it is not for everyone.

those that read me, silent ones, those that delve into the ravings and ramblings will know i am prone to esoteria. one of the biggest patterns in my life has been the 11:11 syncronicity, everywhere i see confirmation. i do contrary to popular thought apply scientific scrutiny to these events, i cover the angles, i'm no blind fatalist. i have discerning abilities and i use them on all things, pulling them apart, deconstructing, changing perspective and repeating to see it the result is constant. this makes a good science fiction writer not a fantasy writer, for example in fantasy a broomstick will have intelligence and a sense of humor that does not need an explanation, yet in science fiction we have a scientific principle, the broom has an artificial intelligence and a personality chip embedded within it's architecture.
11:11 follows me everywhere, it hunts me down almost everyday, now there are good reasons why this happens i usually am driving at those times, or my routine is set that i look at the time at those two times, or perhaps i am just subconsciously driven to seek those specific times. who knows, really.
all i know is i see the numbers twice a day, i have done for many years and investigation reveals that it's a sign of confirmation. so that's how i will take it, weather it's from my self or something else, i don't know. maybe it's a sign of schizophrenia.

i spend a quiet hour with the high priestess discussing her new business adventure. i'm uncertain about it but the more she talks the more convinced i become, she has great power to fulfill her ambitions, and i really hope she does whatever form they take, but i think she has a very large destiny.

raw footage shows a woman and man sitting around a table, they are holding hands and there's enough eye contact to indicate they are lovers. the man is in his forties the woman late twenties. there is one other person there, a medium, we see the back of her head but never the face, however we hear her voice, she is asking if someone is there, the table starts to shake and the couple grip hands tighter. the medium has a grim determination upon her face, 'who is this?'
suddenly her mouth opens and her head is thrown back, her eyes remain open but have been replaced with a red colored pigment, not bloodshot but crimson. her voice changes dramatically.
'you have summoned me humans. you know the cost?'
the couple look nervously at one another, this was not expected, they never once considered the idea that there may be authentic demonic contact. they had been exposing fake mediums for almost a decade and never had they seen anything that came in this form. despite the technology and sophisticated slight of hand most mediums used, this was frighteningly realistic.
'what is the cost demon?'
'one human life. one pathetic life. whose is it to be, yours or the pretty little girl, or the host who i inhabit.'
the woman breaks the circle, she stands up.' martin, i think we need to leave, this is just getting to heavy.'
'demon, i want proof that here is life after death, not trickery, how do i know this is not an elaborate trick.'
'there is death after life then life after death. you request proof, i then i chose your soul.'
martin fell forwards, his face slamming into the table.
the woman, grabbed him and lifted his head from the table, the medium opened her eyes. she looked at the scene before her and rubbed her eyes.
'it's martin, i think he's dead.' the girl said.
the medium laughed, 'what is going on, off course i am not dead.'
that's when the screaming started.

the great id entity swims through space and time, it is one of the universes most highly evolved beings, it has no physical shape or form and exists in several dimensions, often at the same time, it travels the cosmic highways but always returns to earth.
here is a planet inhabited by a species in eternal conflict, they bicker and squabble, they rise and fall, they create then destroy, yet each individual entity has within them the same struggle, they wrestle with their egos, their emotions, their feelings and desires, they are conflicted and confused as they attempt to gain control over base desires and impulses. it is the battle of the soul. as a species this reflects in almost everything they do, such is the limits of their duality.
some create constructs around these inner conflicts, some cave in to their desires, others repress, but whatever path the conflict remains. is there any escape from this, death only brings rebirth.
earth is a perfect feeding ground for the great id, here it can suck on the energy of the conflict, the trauma or negative energy is sucked out and replaced by a healing energy, the id eats negative energy and that found in personal conflicts are the the most nutritious and pure. the great id feeds well when it visits earth and earth likes this exchange as the earth benefits if people are healed and healthy and free from inner conflict.

discernment is a highly developed skill, i use it all the time, energy is difficult to read sometimes, peoples intentions are complex, often driven unconsciously and no matter how much people say they know themselves they don't, they can't lest they would never say that.
i on the other hand know enough about myself to know that nothing is as it seems.

i went into the city this evening to wander around glebe books where i picked up jah wobbles autobiography, i'm not sure why, i just figured he would have something interesting to write. i'll keep you posted on that. i also saw my friends band, this gentle flow who were playing their first gig at the roxbury in glebe, they were very good, i felt their energy swirl around the room, some disembodied drumming and voices and blam! screeching guitars and bases and vals very suitable gothic vocals kick into gear, i could feel the industrial sound, it was very present, the stage show could develop in an interesting direction. i hope i can be half as good as that when i play live. note to self, (must learn lyrics)
many people came up and said they liked what they have heard of snuff music. a crusty goth said he had never heard anything like 'adventures.' some one else said they really loved the new stuff, they said it was very different to adventures. all these confirmations are encouraging, the next two songs are written but need some tweaking, plus i have to contemplate an arrangement for an instrument i think will work well in one piece. its designed by two quantum physicists and sounds quite alien. i love its vibe.
unfortunately i have to exit early as i have to meet jake and take him home, he's chatting away about this and that and the conversation steers into our need to have adventure and break out from convention, he is a chip of the old block. he's been reading books i have lent him or recommended, so far im impressing him with some good ones, 'red claw' and the 'terror' and 'masques', whose author once wrote on this very blog. yeah we seem to be very similar jake and i, although he did inherit his mothers memory thank god, she has a photographic one whereas mine is swiss cheese.

hot evening, chilling out at mission control with the dog, we decide it's a good time to call berlin, and make contact with martin, usually we just leave a message on the answer phone. tonight i'm about to do just that when my message is intercepted by martin and we proceed to chat about, women, crowley, england, weather, music, kabbalah, the old testament and the old days. martin said he was jogging to keep slim and going to a psychiatrist, he also said he had been studying judaism as he has discovered his heritage. it's funny as he used to take the piss out of me all the time for being jewish now he's more jewish than i am.
god works in mysterious ways.
i agree that we will meet sometime soon.

all gods have their agendas. they kinda disappoint like that and ayahuscia is no different. the human spirit should be free to do what it wishes, as long as it is in the interests of life. to be told by a plant consciousness you are forbidden is hard for me to reconcile, however i will modify my experiments iin magickal realms as a point of honour but this is on my terms sister not yours. i am not enslaved and i never will be, i am free to chose what i do and how i am.
it's strange how yesterday started with the blog entry about what's permitted until forbidden and the day ended for me being forbade.

i can't articulate my aya experience, it was complex and i think corrupted by judgments and personal feelings from others. i think i need to go deeper and break through the fear i felt and complete the experience. however i will leave you with this thought.
all religion comes down to this idea. the battle for the soul is waged between forces of light and forces of darkness. polarities and dualities. wear white not black. however it is the nature of man to confuse his white with black and light with darkness.

lucifer is venus, the morning star, they first star the ancient romans saw in the morning. light bringer. it was the christians that turned lucifer into satan. they are totally different energies. yet the mention of lucifer brings terror such is our conditioning.

EVERYTHING NOT FORBIDDEN IS COMPULSORY

so said merlin, and so said a fortune teller who read my fortune many years ago, about 22, in the soho london. at the time i was having some sort of psychic meltdown, a fragmentation bomb had been planted and must have exploded sending my mind in all directions, i was not sleeping, eating and running on strange kinetic energy that sent electrical sparks from my fingertips, i'd been rejected by the drs and nurses at the hospital who said i was on drugs, so my ex wife took me to this psychic. it was a strange thing. the guys said a whole heap of mumbo jumbo, some of it was very very accurate, especially about the relationship. but then he said EVERYTHING NOT FORBIDDEN IS COMPULSORY and looked at me as though he had seen something he recognized. he said 'you must live this.' this is why you are here.
and so i have 22 years later, one lifetime feels like hundreds.

get up, walk dog, grab wallet, get haircut, meet tim, discuss crop circles, strange spirals in the swedish skies and come home to sleep, day of rest and rejuvenation.

late nights early mornings, from a big yellow moon to the big yellow sun, i break down the door of an old freind, gate crash her morning. she cooks me up some opium based tea and we plug our nural nets into a fable. crystal clear alternative realities, i skim the surface, getting familiar with the place, some what familiar and yet different from my memory, it's london meets lord of the rings, people here have lives richer than mine, it seems although there's a meanace here that must be defeated. i'm an avitar, my body is a young girl.
my friend and i start our quest, she is a killer, cold bloodlust sparkle in her eyes, wreaking havok upon the monsters and spiders and terrible shadows that emerge from the darkness. whereas i am the shadow, stealth explorer she is the terror. however afer a few minuites i find myself enjoying the carnage, killing anyone who gets to close, my weapon the crossbow, i refine my aim, my speed and dexterity and apply zen like concentration to the task at hand, my guts churn as the opiates kick in, my head starts to sweat, for the first time in a long time, i am relaxed and totally at peace outside of my body, killing and single minded lazer like concentration focused upon the quest and this fable.
fable reminds me of a girl, a swizz girl i think, she's in NZ now but i met her at a church gig and we ended up four wheel driving up to fraizer island. she played that song over and over, it was a trance song by some one called robert miles.

listening to sounds on a pair of whizz bang head phones:

tingle down my spine, where's my dancing boots, i gotta hold up my head up high and lay down some roots,
im the demon from your dreams, the one behind the schemes, so eloquently evil and yet...
im not
sweat drips down your face, when you hear my breath, right down your neck as i move in for the kiss of death
yeah the kiss that makes your heart miss a beat, boom boom, sonic boom, the lips bloom, not so evil after all
am i?
just a funky little demon
a little misunderstood
under cover lover
im the one that slips away
before first light of day.

The World's Hardest Game - Avoid the blue circles and reach the green beacon

2010 fucking no more room in the head space, rent just went through the roof, even the bats moved out, chasing shadows, something flickers as the lights go out, left in darkness, i'm moving slowly past the memories of the year. a girls voice laughing as im running through the gaps, i'm on her heels but she's agile whereas i am just a fat fuck. the smell of exotic flowers fills my nostrils, i can just make out the phosphorous traces, see the shine, a thin veneer of lost nature. the girl has long gone, there's a light breeze, i feel something with my foot, i reach for it, a bone, a skeleton in the closet. the closet. i jump in the dark end, falling into some thing.
today.
i have been working heaps, every hour all for the cash, all because i have this vision, 'snuff music' and i believe in it as something of value, something worth producing. two tracks down the third is written, the idea generates itself, it's born and growing all the time, it can't be stopped, each breath captain mission takes now is to give life to what i believe will be something worthwhile. i have excellent people involved in this project. it's the year of the deep fix. cities crumble, oceans dry, trains collide on a regular basis, stars explode, planets leave their orbit, ideas come and go, man will rise and man will fall, the tide will ebb and flow, but the only thing i know is the deeper it goes, the deeper the mix, the deeper it moves, the deeper the fix.

peace