post trauma i'm walking around like an egyptian mummy, the doctors are amazed at my regeneration powers, dr. who has nothing on me, i heal fast. some head shrink asks me questions
'what is your first memory?'
'well there was this huge explosion of light.'
'what day is it?'
'today.'
'where are you?'
'here'
'why are you so elusive?'
'a fish'
'what will you do now?'
'everything'
'how did you heal so fast?'
'will power'
'what is the meaning of life?'
i start to laugh and they inject me with more drugs. they peel of the bandages to see i am invisible.
i don't mind the drugs, they space me out a bit, it's like a holiday from myself, i go travelling through while they prod, poke, scan and chart me.
when they send me through the magnetic doughnut machine i cause an electrical blackout, the system crashes.
technicians run around, a man in a suit comes from his office and gawks at me, he pulls out a mobile phone.
at night i sneak outside and cclimb up on the rooftop with adrianna the sexy nurse, we smoke joints and watch the stars, i point out sirius.
'that's home baby, i'll take you there one day.'
she giggles and starts to kiss me. we make love on the ceiling and spend the night star gazing. she peels of her human skin revealing herself, she points to pleades and says in her husky voice,
'that's home baby, i'll take you there one day.'
later they put me on a bench and strap some wires into my brain and inject me with some kind of sedative, i slip into a sweet erotic dream. when i wake up the machines are burnt to a crisp.
adrianna and i start to fall in love, we know there are connections between us we can not yet unfathom, we speculate we are agents deep undercover. on a mission we can't quite recall, working for different teams but thrown together, destiny.
one day they hypnotise me and interrogate me. the interrogator attempts to send me back into my early years and he is shadowed by a neuroscientist who has my eyes hooked up to a screen magnifying them thousands of times. unfortunately the neuroscientist has some sort of epileptic seizure and the interrogator begins to regress to his own childhood, he starts crying for his mother.
one night adrianna and i decide we must hack into the mainframe and find a clue to our mission. she surfs through the terminals and accesses the secret files and folders, she breaks through the encryptions and codes, she is navigating her way into the darkest parts of the zeros and ones when she finds the doorway. she gives me a confirmation look, i nod and she descends through the gateway.
seconds feel like minutes, minutes feel like hours, i watch her unable to assist. then suddenly without warning she returns.
she looks at me, i can register the shock in her eyes. it's inevitable, we are looking for one another, we found one another, now we must kill one another.
love has a strange way of working.
'come on adrianna, we don't have to do anything, we are free.'
but i am looking at the weapon she has pointed at my head. she is crying.
'i'm so sorry, i have to follow my orders.'
'do we have to follow orders.'
'i love you so much.'
she says, her fingers start to squeeze the trigger and her eyes begin to close.
she never saw my blade coming at her neck.
as she lay on the floor gasping i stand over her.
some one speaks with my voice, i don't really recognise it,
'everyone is programmed to follow their orders adrianna. they think they are free but they are not. even if they don't follow their direct orders and attempt to rebel, they are just following higher orders. it's a fucking closed system baby. theres no escape, except one.'
she can't believe it. she gasps to speak but can't quite manage. it and the words come out distorted, i think she starts choking on her blood. i make out her final words
'thank you.'