up at dawn, take the long walk along terrible beach, the new walkway is spectacular as the sun pierces the dawn. everyone out without the mask, without bothering about the social distancing, it's good to see. as if a flimsy mask can actually stop a virus. 'follow the science' the dumbed down zombies say, and if you do you actually discover the truth. i have to laugh at humanity, lemmings or sheep. 

i get as far north as possible and turn around, a few swimmers are out and a handful of surfers out on the point, dangerously close to the rocks.

i grab my new coffee, a macadamia latte. sip slowly watching the surf, the electric blue sky and the sun kissing my skin. it's a good life.

i've been watching the new adaptation of phillip k dicks, 'the man in the high castle' and it's excellent although the pace is slow, execution to detail is accurate and the plot intriguing, even though it deviates from the novel somewhat i wonder where it will take me. 

imagine if the nazi and japanese armies had won the war, imagine an america divided west and east, the west japanese the east german. a small slither of mid state as a free zone. imagine the japanese uneasy alliance with the nazi's as a small resistance smuggles cinema films interstate that depict an alternative reality where the allies won the war. that's just the background in which the story takes place. 

alternative history is interesting but not a genre i have really enjoyed, i read a book once about what may have happened had the american indians met the romans but generally i stay away from these types of books. pkd managed to cover many themes in his work, and alternative history of 'the man in the high castle' is recognised as one of his greatest works. 

i drive the hybrid back home, i like driving it when the roads are empty and the sun is out, it's very relaxing. at home i potter around and complete my chores, it's a good feeling. i take a few calls and then find myself exhausted so i sleep upon the chaise lounge and let the afternoon pass me by. 

every one knows only one person made it through afghanistan, alexander the great but even that was considered his greatest challenge, as just like russian, america and nato he left battered and with not much to show for it. the harsh terrain and guerrilla warfare laid claim of all of alexander's successes. despite winning most battles the torturous enviroment from ice capped mountains to dry desserts took their toll and when he left after two years the country descended into factions. he did leave a mark, cities are still standing kandahar the most infamous, he found his bride there as well. but afghanstan also left it's mark upon alexander, and it was shortly after this campaign his mental state declined into fear and paranoia, he began drinking heavily and began to demonstrate cruelty.

a famous rudyard kipling poem written during the british invasion...

and when you are wounded and left upon afghans plains

women come out to cut up your remains

just troll to your rifle and blow out your brains

and go to your god like a solider.

and now in contemporary america withdraws in the most brutal clumsy arrogant way, due to one man. an illegitimate president whom was supported by wall street, hollywood, china and the media, not to mention the countless idiots who supported him. a man whose history of foreign affairs has been failure and catastrophic decision making. always backing the wrong horse. these people are responsible. they were so politically inept and focused on stopping trump their prejudice and embedded confirmation bais was unable to see clearly. now i hope when they see their tv screens and watch mothers throwing their babies at soldiers to rescue from the taliban they realise (although they are two brain dead to ) that those soldiers they are entrusting their babies lives with are the children of the deplorables.  

what a shameful situation, the us government is a disgrace and biden must be impeached. and the people that voted for him need to get a grip on how stupid they have been. the sad thing is the vice president is even worse.  

 here's a strange tale
just over a week ago i seriously began to have trouble breathing, i'd developed a cough and my chest hurt. worse than all of this was the way i'd be exhausted after putting on my socks, walking to the mailbox or just getting up. i thought the coughing was due to having to wear a mask, but when i started coughing at home i knew something was afoot. 
so i'm at work and start to feel very strange, in fact i do something i have never done which is leave early. i planned to drive to the covid testing clinic as obviously that's what i figured i must have. it was only a matter of time and to be honest i actually wanted to catch it and have natural immunity. however by the time i arrive at the clinic it's shut, not to reopen until midday the following day. 

at home i have a shower slip into my pjs and put on some agatha christie drama. i'm establishing a theory that the second wife did it or was it the son in law?  but when my phone rings my detection skills go on hold.

its a friend, 'how are you?' she asks.

i tell her.

'get to hospital,' she says.

'no, i don't like hospitals,' i say.

my friend knows me well. she knows i won't go so she calls an uber and gives me 10 minitues to pack a bag. i'm somewhat cursing her under my breath despite her good intentions, besides my pattern recognition was about to come together and reveal the killer.

i grab a pair of pants, a fresh shirt and a toothbrush. and a dune messiah which i am reading. 

sure enough the uber is waiting.

at hospital i do all the entry questions and they place me in isolation. i know i must have the covid and when the doctor appears tell him i need a test. he gets together with a few other doctors and they look me over, start sticking me in telemetry and monitoring equipment.

you've had a heart attack, they say.

i'm moved into a new area, scanned and x rayed and various drips attached to me, and a nurse says, you need magnesium and potassium.

i get a bag of magnesium and about 20 bags of potassium, plus i have to drink several potassium tinctures. 

later they wheel me into a private room in intensive care, and leave me in isolation until they get the covid results. 

about several hours later, a nurse comes in and says she can move me, the results are negative. so i end up in a nice little room in the cardio ward. again it's sealed and has a huge shower, toilet area, it has a nice window with a fantastic view from which i can watch the sunrise, it has several monitors and quite a comfy bed. my heart rate is twice what it should be, they have to bring it down and after several days they do. i have to take some meds, and i figure these are traditional meds and tried and tested. then some nurse comes in and tells me i have to have an angiogram. there's a 1 in 1000 chance i could die from it. i have to sign some paperwork. 

the doctors and nurses are amazing, they come in introduce themselves and treat me with the upmost respect and compassion, it's incredible. this is a public hospital. i have always thought australia as one of the best health systems in the world but this proves it. even a waiter comes to take my meal orders, and there's a vast choice of different things to choose from. 

i resign myself i'm hear fro the long haul and settle into a routine. it's actually peaceful and at least i can read. there's a tv if i want but i keep it switched off. 

eventually i come to accept the peacefulness of it all and when my phone rings it becomes irritating, and although i am speaking to people who are obviously concerned about me, i really just want to be left alone. my friend who forced me into hospital thus saving my life sends me two massive bags of luxuries. however i can't eat the stuff she has sent as it's sugary, salty, liquid or irritates my throat. i do use the notebook she sent and smile at the photo she sent although the frame is broken. 

there's a few books too. some clothes that don't fit me and a toiletry bag stuffed with lipstick and eye liner. cute.

the days and nights fade into a sort of strange blur fractured by bloodtests, heart monitors and meals. most of the time i just sit by the bed reading or on the sofa watching the sun rise meditating. 

i weigh 125ks, by the time i am released i weigh 118ks, so i have to maintain weight loss and get down to about 75ks. i have to watch the liquids intake, only one litre a day. i drink one litre of coffee a day so this is going to be very hard.

eventually i am discharged. 

at home i water plants, feed fish and try to clean up the place but give in. a friend takes me shopping, she organises a set of scales with a heart monitor attached. i wander through the fruit shop, i buy a few groceries and remain perplexed at how empty this big shopping mall is, and why all the shops are shut. these covid years are bizarre years, totalitarian and dystopian are the words that spring to mind. that day in melbourne the police use tear gas and rubber bullets on people protesting about lockdowns.

the very same day i catch the pm say, 'we must always fight for freedom'

this is pretty much the information i have been reading about for over a year, actually ever since i stopped believing in the mainstream media and the lies it pushes on certain subjects. there are a number of subjects the media always lies about but this particular one has been dreadful.  it don't take a rocket scientist to join the dots, there are so many to join all pointing in one direction.

what i learnt was the vaccines only cause the virus to mutate. it has to because it's biological imperative is to infect and kill. it was designed to to do this. our bodies have a very good immunity system network that fights infections. however once you put a vaccine in it it compromises our natural immunity and targets the virus which then mutates and slips through the vaccine in it's new form and because our natural immune system is compromised we can't fight it.

no vaccine is administered in the middle of a pandemic.  it's given after when the virus is a singular not variant.

basic elementary research into evolutionary science indicates this yet the people that attack me say i don't follow science, it's true to a point. i certainly don't follow politicalised science which is basically what all the science is nowadays. 

why the mainstream media pushes this narrative boils down to one man, george soros, a fucking evil bastard if ever there was one, just like fuaci, gates, schwab and the other fucking technocrats who basically have all the power and control. all it requires is to begin joining the dots. the left wing woke ideology is a threat to the way of life we have, debate all you wish about the illusion of freedom but given a choice i rather live in the illusion of freedom than the grim truth of a technocracy.  

its weird  how people who follow science follow it religiously and with the same zealot attitude applied to religion. i've always figured the two entwined, science a religion for sceptics. if you know anything about science it evolved from alchemy which is a spiritual pursuit. what most people follow now is a church of science.

contemporary science is a political tool, just like religion, far removed from any kind of truth. which is why this vax thing is a scam, and the more it's pushed the more obvious it becomes. i do feel all people need to do is listen to the information they are not allowed to listen to, put away their confirmation bias because mostly what they end up doing is politicising the argument unconsciously. me i have an open mind, happy to discuss other perspectives yet when i do, people play me and say i live in a 'science fiction world' rather than a science one. i've noticed these types love to play the person not the points raised, attack the man not the argument is a typical communist tactic. anyway the science fiction world is now reality as we move further into the trans human age, george soros, bill gates and kluas schwabb sit above elected governments (democracy is dead until free elections are revived) injecting graphene into the body and changing the genetic code of the human is possibly in my own personal philosophy the most immoral thing a human can do. 

a jewish hippie guy says there is only one unforgivable sin, it's not lust, gluttony, envy etc, its to blaspheme the holy spirit, the body is a temple. it says the same thing in the old books but jesus seems to carry more weight than moses. anyway the first step in transhumanism is to change the body. let me say here and now, i'm all for it however there are ways to do this that work well and evolve the human species in line with the natural order. read up on noah and tubal cain as allegory. 

speculating in my 'science fiction' way, the singularity is upon us. these people that have far to much money and power need one more thing. life extension. they wanna life forever. and this is their pathway. i don't have a problem with eternity, i've been around almost as long but there are other methods to do it, spiritual ones. but these guys have no connection to spirit, they surrendered their humanity a long time ago. they wanna build back better, they don't want you to own anything yet are vastly materialistic themselves and they need to depopulate the world. it's been on the front page of the united nations website for 30 years when i was going on about agenda 21 and everyone was thinking i was nuts. now any switched on cat is aware of agenda 31 (as they call it now)

when i lived in avalon we all knew about it. we discussed it and understood the implications, especially when it came to the codex alimentarius and the plan to ban any supplementary medicines.  that was a long time ago and they are still tying, spanning out from the united nations into world health, into various ngos and soros funded  agencies and in league with the chinese communist party. big tech loves the ccp, they are the same thing, where do you think all that surveillance software comes from.

science fiction, nope, this is science reality, the world we live in. 

anyway if you got the vax i don't blame you, i was very fearful but i guess skeptical enough to investigate. i just looked at the media and realized they all seemed to be pushing the same story without asking the obvious questions. what's in the vaccine and why should people whom have already recovered from covid be forced to take it? why are you not talking about the side effects or promoting the yellow card system (in uk) and what happened to all the people that died of flu? and the bleeding obvious one every single journalist needs to ask right now, gibraltar?

to me these were obvious questions and i sought out the answers, however what i experienced was if you seek answers you are vilified, not just by authority but the vaccinated. they literally dance on the grave of skeptics when they die from covid. these compassionate hypocrites actually get joy when someone dies. i don't want anyone to die, i actually wish i were wrong, it's not a fucking game yet the global establishment and media made it one. even the stats didn't make sense and then you discover that the scientists, virologists, doctors and molecular biologists who have a different opinion are now cancelled and have gone underground. i listened to a vast amount of people talking freely about this including dr. robert malone the man whom invented mrna vaccines. he has had to go underground because the american govt have threatened him. the ex chairperson of pfizer has warned people not to get the vax unless they are compromised and anyone who advocates the alternative successful treatments are either struck of by whatever authority overseas their profession. you can't see that doctor crying his eyes out in a senate hearing begging to be allowed to continue prescribing invermetin, saying he had saved hundreds of his patients lives with it. you tube banned it.

so i have no more energy to wank on about it, i made my own decision. i want to get the virus, i don't mind. that way i will build up my own antibodies and don't need the jab. if i die then i die and it's on me. you can all dance upon my grave but i am not going to cave into media pressure from celebs, politicians and peers who try guilt games as if they are unaware that even the vaccinated can infect. in fact what they have yet to learn is the vaccinated actually cause the variants. this is what dr. malone and hundreds of virologists have said ( you never vaccinate in an epidemic only after it) and explained it in evolutionary terms. if the virus comes up against a defence it will adapt, it's what all viruses do.that spike protein is a biological weapon. take gibraltar which is almost fully vaccinated. yet it's now reporting a 2500% increase in infected cases. 

anyways work it out for yourselves here i'm not out to convince anyone just state my own perception. and if another person says, 'come down to earth' to me i will fucking cancel them myself. what a fucking insult to say to a social worker. 

here's some science that is not political but remember, you can't un-see this

it's like a scene from a bad movie, some people are at the door awaiting payment. i search through my bag pulling out items, pens, books, a spare mask, a scarf, a scrap of paper, another pen and wait... whats this, some lacy thing which as i open turns out to be a pair of womens black panties.  i stuff it back in and grasp my wallet. this is a new bag, a few weeks old.
later i ponder these undies, whose are they and how did they get in my bag, did anyone notice, and do i care. i have no idea where they came from. 

my life's like that.

wandering along the shoreline, following the starfish trail, the waves are tranquility blue, layered in a network of codes and lattice like information, i read the energy and inhale the negative ions. it's almost green today, crisp air, sharp and blade like while the rising sun begins to make a slight difference, dial turning up, skin adjusting. it's all so beautiful. 
not many out this early, mostly people stick to the path whereas today i've gone off track, onto the sand. when my cousin came out here he declared it was the most beautiful and fave place he had ever seen.  he loved it, whereas i love it and let it love me. 
the birds are healthy, clean and filled with an energy that keeps them young. they swoop down to investigate and a couple of pelicans circle above my head. 
the water is free from people, no surfers, swimmers, boats, it's moving form is nebulous liquid and when i get to the golden path i stop. 

my salutation to neptune. it's been a long time since we communed.

okay, it's been a while since i wrote anything political or controversial but here are my thoughts, her's what i think and no doubt it's going to cost me but it's time to listen.

firstly i understand how you felt about trump, you read the sydney morning herald, you watch and listen to the abc, you believe these guys are the gospel, why would we think differently. i have an advantage, i followed all that socialist bullshit as a kid, and religiously read the guardian. i believed in them and then they sold out sarah tisdall a young public servant who like me thought these people were onside. the guardian fucking sold her out and she went to jail because she had a conscious. these left winger i learnt have no principle, they fight a side no matter what it is who it is or what they say. this is why they cancel people. the argument makes no sense, their arguments are riddled with hypocrisy and double standards and the media lie about almost everything that does not push their globalist agenda. 

now as an adult i find myself alienated in my lack of respect for the left, i see through the academic intellectual ideology, i see through the university brainwashed thinking, the weapons they use are absurd. they call racists, sexists out at every chance while ignoring their own. 

not that i have much respect for the other side, i loathe them to but i'm capable of following an argument on policy without attaching it to a side. a good idea is a good idea. 

when trump came along i was happy as he was not a politician, he was no great orator but he did make a commitment to, 'drain the swamp,' and the swamp is vast and wide and deep. it's the deep fucking state.

from the word go the establishment attacked him, called him a russian agent and ignored all the incredible things he did economically. all i expect from any govt. is to get a good economy in their country. they tried to nail him every chance they got, they humiliated him, banned him, lied through their teeth about him and denigrated any achievement he made. when asked why they were out to get him he replied, 'they are not really out to get me, they are out to get you, i am just in their way.'

the most powerful statement ever made by any president.

cancelled!

so we got biden in a stolen election, (chinese hackers working with some naughty democrats like pelosci) sure joe was promoted by all the establishment, hollywood, wall street (who just lost a trillion dollars of american workers pension funds to the chinese), the left and the usual suspects but he's suffering demetia and will be removed soon. it's elder abuse to keep him propped up while he forgets who and where he is. his son and him got a free pass from the media when they knew hunter was having sex with underage kids, on the payroll of the chinese govt. and being used to gain access to his dad. 

while western govts, america and australia funded wuhan scientists in gain of function research the chinese knew only one man on the global stage stood in the way of their ambition, hong kong, tiawan and the south pacific. it was trump. 

the war had already started 10 years earlier, via the economy. china had been buying up strategic points all over the globe. it had become the manufacturing agent of the world thanks to weak western leadership and dumb decisions made by left and right globalists. the un had already done the work, modelled itself of chinese communism under the alluring concept of the great reset, a mish mash of technology, environmentalism, socialism and control, i call technocracy.

this is where the individual is ruled by the expert, only the expert is on the payroll of the dictator. thus china moved into the second stage of its war and released flights directly into the wold infected with covid while restricting internal flights. the biological warfare caught us by surprise, even now no body has looked into the genesis of the event. the who is corrupt and on the chinese payroll so their investigation was compromised. and now a year and a half later we see troops on the streets of sydney keeping people in check should they take of their mask. 

the truth is this c-19 is a deadly virus that kills less than 0.01% of the infected, usually those with compromised immune systems and vaccines should be used for those people. but know this, vaccines create mutations and variants, it's simple evolutionary biology, and ironically all the automatons that blurt out how much they follow science are not following science at all. they are following the technocracy. the science has been cancelled. the vaccines have a life of 6 months, if people had researched the pharmaceutical companies they would have seen the investor page where investors were told they would have annual returns on the software of the vaccine as it had to be administered and updated. 

think. if they really wanted to keep you safe they would have said use hydroxychloroquine which is tested has a very high success rate against c-19 and is safe. same with invermectin which pulled india out of an appalling death rate quickly. these facts have been cancelled.

why was the govt health experts not telling people to increase their intake of vitamin c and d and zink and eat vegetables and avoid processed foods. the masks inhibit oxygen which we need, the social distancing creating anxiety and depression which compromise the immune system. why are the streets of south west sydney filled with soilders enforcing these stupid rules while the beaches of east sydney are packed. why is the biden administration forcing vaccines on people including children while letting 2 million people through the mexican border who are untested. 

if you have a critical eye, nothing about this makes sense, there are so many inconsistencies, olympic games, sports is allowed but numbers at a funeral have to be limited?  

you have to have swallowed the cool aid if you trust the technocracy have your interests at heart, or if you think they are benevolent. they are the same bastards that have been in control for the last 30 years, getting more and more control from the individual. so much control they now tell you when you are sick. 

these experimental vaccines have not been tested, they are not fda approved and the cdc is now admitting they do not work. investigate the spike protein in your body. it's the most dangerous weapon in this war. 

it took me almost 50 years to get around to reading dune, which many say is the best sc fi novel ever written.  i can understand why it holds that title. now all i want to do is read the sequence and see what herbert does with his story and where he takes us.

i can't say it is the best sci fi novel i have read but it certainly is amongst the top, it's scale is massive and the story once you crack it moves fast and has considerable nuance. 

 

the spice must flow

i never read dune as a kid, although i had enjoyed almost all the other sci fi classics. dune somehow had slipped through the keeper and although i had two attempts knew i was not really ready for it. it's funny when that happens, intuitively i know when i need to wait before i read a book, sometimes it's decades. 
so the new film is being made by denis villenuve a dirctor i have always loved since seeing incinderies in 2010. the fact he is even considering an epic as dune does make a strange kind of logic when you think of his body of work. 

so as looked at the books i had yet to read i chose a few but it was dune that ended up in my travelling bag. i took it with me, yet it was only on my flight back i began to read it.

i'm still into it, 

it's incredible, i understand what the fuss was all about. it's a perfect plot, brilliant characters and a perfect example of world building, comparable with lord of the rings although a completely different concept. 

i did see david lynch's version, the short one and the redux 3 hour cut. it was sketchy, as was the tv series which at least serialized the second book as well. the tv version was written and directed by english sci fi writer john harrison, so it had that going for it.

anyway's back to the book.

i'm loving it, the concept, the ideas are so relevant. an environmental spiritual treatise with political intrigue and subversion. truly a science fiction great.

the spice must flow. 

lot's of movements, it's strange these days, i hardly know where i am, sleeping in a different house each night, moving through people like a phantom, new connections, old faces, new places, the promise of a better future. i get one single day respite, a day of rain where i crash on my sofa and fall into a deep sleep. my mind carries me upriver, some kinda electric dream in blue. sex and death with old captain mission. conrad meets burroughs. i splay some voodoo, deal with amanda and her white worm lust. i'm living a stranger life than ever, no one would believe the things i have done, life stranger than fiction. i peek outside, the moon seems bright for a moment, the stars reveal themselves and then clouds close in like a curtain at an old theatre.

on with the show, the show must go one. more rain, more hours frittered away in a strange narcolepsy where dreams collide with dreams and new dreams are birthed. 

where do dreams go to die?

they go as far north as i can get.

the invite comes out of the blue and it's timing is perfection, but we have a tocking ticking clock to beat as things in the city begin to heat up. the c-19 is back, came out the blue and into the streets, i guess opening up flights from india was a miscalculation, connotations of racism lurk under the surface but whatever the flights arrived and bring in the delta strain. 

my travelling companion wants to fly out early but i'm stuck in a fixed coordination. i do encourage her to leave early and escape but she sticks it out and we rendezvous at the airport early morning. wandering around the empty departure lounge i notice our flight is the only one out for the city, it could be cancelled at any time as down the feed we hear about lock-down. 

on the plane as we lift of i count my blessings, whatever deities pull my strings they seem to have good fortune towards me. men of good fortune cause empires to fall i whisper to lou reed, well that's something at least. behind me everything fades.

up the cost we check into a friendly cottage in a cool seaside village. the shops are just across the street and there's some cool restaurants nearby. my generous friend takes me for many fabulous dinners, the best mexican food ever in a funky joint that has her picture painted on the wall in a large south american style. it's uncanny. i dunno, i'm kinda new to mexican food. 

the days begin to melt, i watch a lot of good shows on the stream, i read and sleep, lots of lounging around and my body begins to revert to it's default settings. my dreaming becomes intense saturated in high concept and drama like qualities, always percolating a future. one morning i wake up after a colourful dream that was more acid trip, i'm literally reeling from the whole experience like a phycadelic experience.  

the second week we move to a seaside apartment that is literally on a secluded beach. it's magnificent, and i sit on the balcony watching the ocean and scanning the three islands. colourful birds visit us and as we nest in a huge comfy sofa we watch movies and sleep. 

one day we drive to bellingen. i discover some incredible blueberry jam. we literally put it upon everything we eat afterwards. strangely a few days after returning to sydney i meet a woman whom informs me through casual conversation her best friend owns a farm in bellingen that grows blueberries and makes a niche jam. go figure.

the days merge into luxury as i sleep, walk, eat and watch movies. my companion has good tastes in drama and we binge watch all the stuff i need to see.

on the return as we land i'm picking up the urgency of sydney's lockdown. it's serious shit, complete control surrendered to our authorities. delta strain changes everything. the fascists move to the left. the goon squad are in town running the show.

i go home, feed my fish, check my mail and the messages. i start my car and take it for a spin. later at home i make some tea, shower and sleep. it's colder now. rainfall in witch road, the wind rattles along the roof. 

back to work tomorrow.   

 

   

  

 kings cross late at night, it's not what i remember, deserted streets, less neon, people and traffic. my big nights in kings cross do not come back, in fact i am surprised by how much i walk towards my destination without memory intruding. i'm following my phone which is telling me i am 20 minites drive away from where i need to be. impossible, this place is near the station and i need to be there on time.

i notice two girls fumbling in a door way and ask if they know where my destination is. 

they are very helpful and friendly but say they have no idea where it could be. i ask them if they know the number of the apartment they are entering, and when they tell me i work out it's literally two doors away from where i need to be. i thank them and wander down the street to a brightly illuminated entrance, where crystal balls, tarot cards and incense greet me, along with some bohemian types.

they make a big fuss over me, offer me food wine and i decline politely. there's a few chairs in front of a screen and some interesting faces. but along the walls are many old books and volumes that my eyes gaze upon and scan. 

i'm early and although i must say i liked the range of books nothing leaps out, except an issac beshev singer hardback that contains three novels all of which i have. but it's unusual, i've never seen a volume like that before. he's an author i adore.

later i grab a seat second row from the front, i put my bag down to claim it while i use the bathroom. when i return it's been taken by a large man and his estonian girlfriend. i move to the only vacant chair, front row.

when i first arrived in sydney i hung out in / on the cross, particularly at the book shop 'ex librus' which happened to be next door to 'barons' my fave bar. the old guy that ran 'ex librus' was surprised to encounter a strange english guy with long dreads whom seemed to have a well versed background in the magickal arts and esoteric lore but i was a new guy in town and needed to connect with sydney's current. 

from there i picked up a book called the witch of kings cross. it was a novel, a love story based around a woman artist called rosaleen norton. i enjoyed the book, a terrible tragedy about a scandalous affair between a famous conductor and rosaleen that shocked society. i liked rosee, she was amazing and obviously i investigated her amazed to discover she was not a work of fiction. when i finally saw her artwork, wow! i was bowled over. not just because it was so powerful but because it was so authentic. there were traces of austin spare, and lady harris but with much more power and blatant sexual energy.

i found her inspirational. 

last night i sat with the director sonia bible and a few lucky bohemian types and watched a private screening of a documentary called, 'the witch of kings cross.'

it was brilliant.

i really hope sonia reaps the rewards as she put so much of herself into this. and it appears had the blessing of rosee's family and rosee herself.

stunning!

 

 

i have a new pair of sunglasses, they see the world through a new type of lenses, ultra visionary blue, they work in the fringe spectrums, picking up light that comes from the future. they were constructed on anteries 11 using technology that we would define as impossible and well beyond the laws of known science, yet anterians have a sophisticated quantum science that manipulates light and time, giving them access into the future. obviously technology like this is very difficult to get hold off for an earthbound person, the military have some of this stuff they keep in a place known as area 77, the russian authority also has some but they don't know what it does and the icelandic peoples have some as well but they keep it in an ice cave until they decode the instructions. various indigenous aboriginal cultures have full knowledge of these alien artefacts but they have no use for it and i have heard there is a girl in arizona that also has a pair of these specific uvb glasses but she is mute so it looks like i am the only other human with this technology.

like all my wetware it's an established protocol i use in stealth, a sort of remote viewing time travel mixture. not just the future but also past events. unfortunately i cannot intervene due to various temporal consequences but i can observe. 

last night i self administered the ritual in preparation for the experience, laborious and somewhat arcane, it's funny how future alien tech requires such an anomaly such as ritual and vibration to prepare for it's use. the glasses themselves just appear like sunglasses but the eye's relationship to them changes when the rites are completed.

so hacked in evb i got a fix upon a few new things happening over the horizon, not for disclosure but somewhat concerning. i guess all i can say is humans still navigate through the moral maze while adapting to confirmation biases and their own attachment to whatever foolish thing they have invested in. 

cosmetically beautiful to the tourist sydney has it all. a glorious climate, pristine beaches, blue skies and a decent mix of people, cultures and styles but as i wander through the familiar i'm struck by the sight of the homeless people. their bodies curled up in shop fronts, seeking refuge in parks and under bridges, the homeless never used to be so many in numbers and today, this afternoon i met my first female beggar. 
expectations shattered immediately. she lay there on a small sleeping bag on a crowded street with a hand written sign that states simply, 'don't hurt me' but looked immaculate, quite stunningly beautiful, even in her poverty she maintained her dignity. 
i scanned her on several dimensions, firstly as i mentioned her appearance was incredible, not only well dressed and stylish but her teeth were perfectly cosmetic. it was an anomaly. 
she also wore no jewellery, which seemed contradictory to a young girl her age, not even an ear ring, no visible tattoo's. her footwear was a pair of designer angle length baseball boots and they were clean, as if brand new. 
she sat upon her sleeping bag in some sort of yoga pose, her hair cut short and her nose looked noble and elegant, slightly turned upwards as though she were to good for this world.
i couldn't see her eyes clearly and as i walked passed her i felt a compulsion to ask if she was okay. it was a strange indecisive moment as my own processing was in conflict over the decision. if i spoke to her i may regret it and yet i was curiously drawn to find out more.
i can't describe the processing speed of my thinking, it was quantum, yet like a slow moving ping pong match where all arguments manifested as moves within my mind, and the game that took an hour took a micro second as the arguments for, cut through the ones against, in wonderfully precise aces.
i was standing before her before i knew it.
'are you okay? can i buy you a coffee?'
she looked up at me, she gazed into my eyes making me feel awkward and vulnerable, self conscious as i looked upon her
slightly asian face, a hint of japanese i think.
she smiled the mona lisa smile and bided me to join her at a level i would find uncomfortable and she would find non threatening. i crouched down and awkwardly placed myself upon her blankets, next to her.
i realised she may be mute, her mouth opened but no sounds emitted, just a strange tangled drone, as though she were trying to say something but became stuck upon the first syllable.
i grabbed my note book and a pen, passed it to her and she immediately began scribbling. not words but an intricate doodle, a fine line of black upon the white page, scrawled around in circular patterns and strange shapes.

i watched mesmerised. 
then in a elegant twist of her had she held the page towards me so i could look at it. it was a complex twirl of patterns, some circles, some triangles and some strange squares. the first thing that struck me as i looked upon this pattern was how similar it was to a crop circle. 

i purchased a coffee for her and a muffin, left her on her blanket and shuffled off to the train station.

in the carriage i took out my notebook and found the drawing. it really was amazing, she had drawn circles that were precise circles, her design was quite beautiful but what the hell did it mean. as i looked at it i began to see within the detail was even deeper detail, and within that even more. just like mirrors facing mirrors, it was infinite, fractal. it must mean something i wondered. my mind pulled me further and further inside the pattern, and eventually i stopped wondering what it meant or could signify, my mind must have surrendered to the experience without any defensive mechanisms, my mind just vanished and i was falling into the patterns infinite depth until i reached no mind.

from that point things got weird. 

i'd once read a book by a guy who wrote of an alien species called the pattern jugglers, they live in the ocean upon many planets and if one submerges in the waters and returns to the land your mind is completely different than upon entrance. they impart or exchange knowledge from other intelligences that have swum within their waters and sometimes if the individual has swum for to long their body is absorbed and they become part of the alien entity. 

this felt similar. 

i had lost my self. it was not difficult as my own self off self is as elusive as any ocean, there are key words i use to define whatever that is but at the end of the day these words are just words. the metaphor is possibly the closest truth we can ever aspire to. except i had pushed beyond. language fell away, my mind opened up to the size of a universe. no body. i am no body. not a poet but part of the poem.

and then suddenly i understood the sigil was activating part of me. feeding me certain spaces within my mind. within the pattern was the girl herself. she was not human, but human. she was dancing in a field of flowers, the moon above her. she smiled and gave me something, it was another pattern this time drawn upon parchment. again as i gazed upon it i began to drown. it was glorious.  

i'm being force fed waffles at a niche cafe down the beach, she's spent almost two hours hounding me to meet her and join her for coffee and eventually i just give in. i mean i have some time and it's a beautiful morning. nothing else happening.

when i get there she's waving one hand over her head, sunglasses on, scarves wrapped around her shoulders like some 60s movie star. as i approach she stands up and leans in for the kiss. there's nothing i can do, resistance is low, i'm so fatalistic the next two hours will be painful as i'm force fed waffles and stories of her exploits in business. oh dear, i hope she don't ask me to invest. 

i smother my waffles in blueberry sauce and start shovelling them down, horrible fucking things, i chew em up and feel so sick as i swallow the big thick wads of whatever evil shit makes waffles. my mouth can feel the blueberry busting, sweet goo slips down the back of my throat and although i have to have some form of conversation with her my mouth stuffed full of waffles it gives me a reason not to.

'it's been such a lovey year for the trade darlink,' she says loud enough for people to overhear. i wish i could just hide my head in shame but all i can do is waffle my waffles and nod my head.

'the market just seemed to explode and now we have america i just feel so blessed.'

i attempt to ask her a banal question but with a mouthful of waffle it just comes out muffled. so i smile nod my head and slump into some sort of weird dejection as my glamorous  companion seems to somehow have ordered more waffles for the table. 'eat, eat, you look so malnourished, i simply must come over and cook for you, i think you need my squid ink pasta darlink, it's divine. tonight would be perfect, i'll bring wine, you like pinots right? you must try the sidewood i have a 2017, it's divine, now have you had your cards read recently, you came up in my readings...'

and on it went, onwards into the drone sound one gets at mind body festivals, middle class women talking about their buddhist practice.

there is only so many waffles a man can eat and if you are a man who hates waffles the number is diminished but she just kept ordering them as i become weighed down by them, they absorbed into my bloodstream and cells, my brain became a big blueberry waffle blob, a trapped audience as she went on and one about her new enterprises, shopping trips, her garden, her spiritual practice, the need for cashmere sweaters and if abc national was becoming to repetitive (possibly the only thing i could agree with but not in a way she would understand)

lets face it she was successful. not unattractive but really loud and flaunting her wealth made her kind of ugly in my book. i mean i've known wealthy people but they are all understated, whereas marylyn just looked like she belonged on san tropez sipping moet with some racing car driver on one arm and some greek shipping magnate on the other. as usual i'm completely out of place. but she is a force to be reckoned with and eventually when the waffles run out i am wrapped in her arms as she kisses me on the cheek and asks if i would like to walk along the beach with her.

'we can put our shoes in my car,' she suggests.

'oh, er i really need to get back, mission control needs me, my sofa needs me, i need my sofa. i need to close my eyes, sink into the depths of some oblivion where there are no sounds, no lights, no people. but what do i know, waffles dumb all resistance down, it's like fluoride, just makes you more susceptible to suggestion so before i know about it, i've dumped my boots in her car and find myself wandering hand in hand down to the shoreline.

thankfully the water is warmer than the air and not freezing, it's quite beautiful, crystal clear and clean. azure blue. 

i stop to look at pieces of debris, that has washed up in the tidal flow of last nights full moon. the sand feels good between my toes, the water laps my feet and despite my waffle stuffed body i figure the day will get better, 'let's just keep walking' she says, 'to the next town.'

first sensible thing she has said. i start to warm up.  

 

ah uh, ha! ha!

i was half heartedly laughing at the joke. i didn't get the punch line but these natives don't like it if you question them. i don't get it, it's a cultural thing. i don't know why your fucking laughing at some thing that has no intelligence, it's not like its a bright observation. its not an interesting story or remotely humorous it's just scatological nonsense and i'm differently wired man, i got an independent analysis. i demand something better than just having my intelligence insulted. i don't find that kind of stuff funny man, it's dumbed down to the lowest common denominator. sure you can be dirty and nasty but it's gotta have a context, saying rude words every five minutes is just infantile and boring. my sensibilities expect quality in all things, humour comes in many forms, if your making observational humour then you need to open your eyes and your mind. not just tell a story and pack it with swearing and a dumb conclusion. 

back at terrigal, hordes of people out in the morning sunshine supernova, that autumn light blinds and bounces, it collides and explodes in consequences, time warps and detours. i follow my flow down to the cafe and grab myself a take away coffee. the waves crash at my feet as i position myself , big beautiful perfect shapes and sounds. everything here is in harmony.  coffee tastes good, i watch the horizon, some intergalactic transmissions are received.

everything speeds up now. i slow it down to snails pace, move through the speed. relativity calls me from florida and we discuss the idea of boats, key west i say. but i am quite happy sitting here, bathed in light, smothered in sound, receiving the signal. 

as i head home i notice my driving has changed, i'm slow, a cruising relaxed slow. soaking it all in. no need for speed now. i have time.

back at mission control i sit on the balcony, stretch out with my book, 'the luminous dead' and wonder about why people would go caving on other planets let alone in the earth. 

im smoking a joint with a woman who claims to be a mathmatitician, she works as a scientists in a research centre. i confess in a cloud of exhaled smoke i am useless at maths and relate a story about my moment of mathematical genius where i plugged into the akashic records and pulled out a logarithmic answer to a geometry question i was asked when i attended skool in london. the purpose of the question was to humiliate me in front of my peers whom all held their logarithmic tables open in front of them while my book was closed. 
'mission what's the sine off...blah blah blah,' mr locket said, in his usual sarcastic and prematurely triumphant tones as he awaited my pathetic attempt.
immediately i gave an answer, it was something like 8.674329.
his face looked down upon the tables in his hand as his eyes followed the lines and then a look crossed his face, it was disbelief crossed with defeat and then instead of acknowledging i had the correct answer he moved on to someone else. 
the scientist starts flirting with me, as if impressed yet i confess i have no mathematical ability entrusting the satori to divinity.
i ask her if it's all numbers, she says yes.
i ask her if we live in a simulation, she says, 'so what if we do?'
i suggest hack it.

she said it would be impossible and i reply, 'i've done it.'

she shows me her breasts.

i wonder if this is something that women do as a response to an certain biological pattern, possibly entrenched within a mating ritual. i dunno, i'm kinda not that interested in her but bemused at how often this happens. 

i don't respond but ask her about the books she has upon her shelves, a selection of science and fantasy. interesting mix.

she asks if i read fantasy.

no, i generally avoid it but i have read the important ones, mervyn peak, tolkien, c. s. lewis and scott bakker. 

she speaks about the 'wheel of time.'

i say, i may one day read sanderson.

then she asks me if i know what the true nature of time is?

'yes,' i say, 'if you hack the universe then you have to understand time.'

we change the subject as someone else joins us, the mathmatitician wants me to go outside with her and smoke bongs, whereas i like the warm indoors.

i speak with her friend who is working with tina arena (crazy world) and i blurt out how much i like one of her songs but i do mention how much i like her as well, she's always been really cool to watch being interviewed. 

the woman agrees and says she is great to work with.

together the three of us watch some tv show, i get a lesson in streaming services and an introduction to a series called, 'jane the virgin.'

one of the girls wraps me in a warm cardigan and i find myself becoming very relaxed, she's almost naked while i'm wrapped up in layers of clothes. i can see where this may go and make my excuses to leave, it's been an interesting evening but i can't say i'm in the mood for any carnal adventures, all i want to do is get back to mission control. i must be getting old.

system upgrades all around, my chaos matrix plugs into the universal engine, it's a discombobulating experience, where mental processes are restored with optimal functionality for manifestation. i used a few ancient techniques but now everything happens at q levels, some sort of inner system of conciseness (unconsciousness) guides me. last night i tuned into a babalon presence that was occurring in the blue mountains area, i dunno how, i just felt it and responded. i guess it's frequency based. anyway lilith says to me, fill her cup so i do.

there's some elegant exchanges, subliminal occurrences, i feel the energy vibrate around my skin, expanding outwards, picking up information in the exchange. i spark up new energy centres, my mind is everywhere, like the exploding universe, i ride the wave, the face of the 'bang' filling up void with zen type. the choas matrix sends me into the new. new captain mission, new adventures, a new age. light explodes everywhere. 

am i a god now? part of god perhaps. i can do anything i want.

what do i want?

2021 is proving to be the year of the ex girlfriend, as another long lost love contacts me. this time meredith, and wow, i'm so surprised. it's great, really great to resume contact. she tells me her head injury turned into epilepsy, we both laugh at what happened to us. simultaneous brain injuries. very strange. anyway that was pretty good to hear from her.

so i'm at home for a few days, clearing up some stuff, organising paperwork. the days a bit wet and light rainfall makes the sunlight filter into a glistening sheen. when i pop out to 'buddha cafe' for a light lunch i notice a few amazing plants and end up buying four.

my home is transforming. indoor jungle.   

as i move through life in slow motion i see the detailed fractures in the systems, the cracks where information fails. i reconcile the dark energy with the energy, i understand the binary codes of existence here.  the secret is in application, and then the equation of faith.
faith.

i work with a lady called hope, she is new and i always tease her about my relationship with her sisters. i don't have one with hope, i say, hope is the expectation of faith. it's a minor difference but nuanced. details like this matter i guess.

good fortune comes to me, i seem to be on a winning streak, i win the lottery almost every week now, much bigger denominations than ever, never over $100 but when my total expenditure is only $10 it's a good investment. maybe it's true, money attracts money. my house just got valued at $900,000, an absurd amount considering i paid peanuts for it. now i've done some significant work on it, new bathroom, amazing balcony, de cluttering, new lighting, it's actually looking amazing. i have no wish to move. i like hanging out here, and the coast is thriving now, even down the beach the buzz is incredible. from dawn to midnight, the place is packed with new bars, clubs, restaurants. i tend to hang out at the hotel looking down upon the beach, a coffee, my book and the feeling of perspective as i see the vast expanse before me. the new walkway looks amazing, people jogging, walking their beasts, pushing prams, it's a busy little bay all the way to the skillion where at the peak you can watch the whales migrate past. 

things are good. very good.

 

 

blasting 'on sunset' the album of 2020 at mission control i am really enjoying the 'plain bad heroine' book, which is grungy and sexy yet quite gothic. it's like emily bronte for punks, fucking great writing.

these days are melting away all negative energy, i bask in sun, lay on my new chaise, smoke a joint and catch up on sleep. my dreams are very vivid, rich and filled with adventures, people faces, exotic landscapes, rich colours and environments. there's an optimism in the air, i can feel it in my blood. i go for early morning surfs, drink coffee at dawn, complete my cleaning and things shift and morph as i clear out mental junk. 

this morning the sun beat down upon my shoulders, it felt like my skin was heating up, absorbing it's energy in photosynthesis like procedures, light eating. i watched the energy dancing upon the water, waves came in, washed at my feet, kissing and blessing me. it feels good to be alive. 

i have a few days to myself, it's rare but i am grateful to be able to spend some time at home. i don't have a big plan just need to tidy up and catch up on sleep, the last few months have left me exhausted.  i am in the middle of a good read, the novel 'plain bad heroines' which is  an excellent story built upon the gothic elements i love plus exceptional characters in a contemporary environment, although the book is somewhat a palimpsest. 

tomorrow i get stuck into the jungle outside my door but today i will finish my lounge room, and start on the kitchen. it's becoming somewhat ridiculous. 

the new bathroom is wonderful, i'm enjoying my float sessions, sleeping so much better after them and really loving the ambience of home. 

i have no plan, everything is in a nice space of flow. a friend lent me a dvd to watch, it's called midsommer and if it's anything like ari's last movie it's going to freak me out so i may watch that one with a friend. 

i have a few k's of almond meal to use for something so i'm going to bake something later, not sure what, but i may go for something savoury and one thing i have perfected in the kitchen is nachos, wow, i make the best vegetarian nachos ever! that is a fact.

    

almost finished the book, 'william burroughs and the cult off rock and roll,' which is better than i thought it would be, the writer has done his research and knows his subject, there's a little new information in there for me to enjoy and a lot of stuff i had forgotten about, particularly the patti smith stuff and jerry garcia bits, i had no ideas jerry was a smack fiend. excellent look at the way william burroughs effected the musicians of the 20th century, from rock to rap.

 the weekend was pleasing, i enjoyed making a new friend although later was surprised she didn't really connect with me in the way i thought she did. i always said i was hard to connect with. i'm so divisive, expectations are often met by disappointment, some people expect something from me and then get some facet of mine which is equally not me as much as it is, i always have to tell people i'm a multitude. i guess only the magickal mind can perceive the magickal mind.

however i was somewhat dejected as i thought this may have possibilities. however i am always quick to remount and ride the unicorn again.

finally i sleep through a night, i program my dreams now, they seem to morph into their own archetypes and my lucidity is mutable, like the rest of me. i'm pushing boundaries in dreamscapes, pushing into the life i want to create. i've come a long way. money is no longer an issue, the universe bestows in the strangest ways, however i need to be frugal, i need to consider the fact things are never as they appear. 

writing- i'm tweaking a few things, they are far from perfect but the over riding need is to get these things out. i have to push, push harder.

big day, up at 5am for a drive north in the rental car, it's a beautiful car to drive, these toyotas are very good. i notice my head hurts more today than yesterday, but i make to to the bay where i spend the morning. then a drive all the way to sydney, two hours on the freeway. 

at 11pm i drive home but have to pull over for a conversation with my boss, i walk in at 1am. shower and then at 3 wake up to a text from a friend. i spend a few hours texting, we fall asleep and and then it's now. 

things to do - do get coffee, sleep or at least lay down then back to work. my poor head is a bit confused. so much to do, so little time. 

reality - this morning i wake up with the sun, go down get a coffee before the traffic gets really bad. i pick up my almond latte and drive home in the new hybrid when suddenly on my right i see this white car travelling straight to me almost on top of my car. he crashes into my rear right side full whack and my car spins around, my head smashes against the side window. 
we pull over at the side of the road and swap details, he's just a kid, a p plater. nervous and shaken. i go easy on him as he fesses up to being responsible which is cool. 

my wheel is really badly damaged. so is my head. 

i spend hours on the phone dealing with insurance and drag myself to doctors while organising a hire car and phoning work to cancel shifts. i spilled my coffee in the crash. 

 

dream - the plane just falls out the sky after a minor explosion, i watch the white and red fuselage hit the ground, not far away from me. it's a loud noise, flames rising and black smoke, but just before it hit the ground the jet on the right wing tears itself away and twirls through the air towards me. 
i'm calculating if it will hit me, the mainframe of the aircraft has already hit the ground but the jet engine is moving at a different speed. i watch as i estimate it will hit about 200 yards away, which it does, and then unexpectedly bounces right over my head, over a high fence and crashes out of sight. 

i run towards the fuselage where the flames are dying out, the twisted metal exposing the rows of seats and dead bodies. some people are wandering around.

i know i can save lives. i race towards the wreckage, smoke and dust thick, black and heavy against the contrast of green grass and blue skies.

once in a previous incarnation when i sojourned the world as a sex god seeking out pleasure and pursuing hedonistic impulses i met my match in an amazing woman called shelly. 

shelly was a part punk, gothic mix of lesbian fetish and industrial culture, she was the high priestess of flesh and cerebral counter culture. a living orgasm machine who dripped sensuality like a snail leaves a slime trail, she turned the heads of all and parted crowds like a prophet parting the red sea. for some reason she attached herself to me. 

at the time i was aloof, wandering post divorce liminal world, numbed out on strange drugs and lost in a landscape of creatures of the night like a cynical vampyre. 

sydney was wild, a zoo without cages, we slipped from midnight clubs to exotic bars and slid from bed to bed, and in my madness i made the worst decision and split up with shelly to chase another girl. the wrong one. it's my fault but the ecstasy didn't help, the strange energy that connected me to one split me from the other. and it's a regret i had because when i told shelly she was beautiful. she took me out for dinner, bought me a beautiful piece of lapis jewelry and blessed me.

a week later i knew i had made a bad choice but shelly had gone, vanished into the night. she had given me a book, which i love called 'modern primitives' and fed my mind while she sated my need.

that was in 1996. 

yesterday we connected again. the universe just spat her out at my feet like it does.

not only is she stunning but she is the same gracious heart and sexual energy, much more powerful now. 

we exchanged a few stories, i was able to tell her how much i loved her but at the time was so emotionally fucked up i couldn't love her. it was only in the post years did i realise how much she meant to me. so i was finally able to tell her, and fill her in on my story.

she says she has some pics of us, and she remembers me fondly which is kinda nice as i probably wasn't really nice at that time.

i hope we can catch up for dinner soon, i really want to.

it's funny how life works out, it was a chance encounter, a strange random event and yet i knew it would happen. it was like i was expecting it.  

the covid year has been hard for people but on a personal note for me it has been a year of thriving growth and success. sure there's luck and chance involved in this but i accept my blessing and just want to be grateful for what has occurred. 

a few mornings ago at 0530 i shut my front door behind me and walked towards my car where i saw in the darkness a long thick black thing which i figured may have been a branch that had made its way under my car and was sticking out about 2 meters. it was no branch. it was a snake, possibly about 3 meters long, as i watched it. i had an appointment i could not be late for so using my capacity to embrace all living creatures except bush turkeys and moths, i negotiated my way inside the passengers door and clambered into the drivers seat. as i reversed the snake made it's getaway somewhere into my front garden, which is an oasis of tropical plants and wildlife.

there it has remained for a few days, in the garden of eden.

new car, very sexy sophisticated machine. more akin to a space ship than a car, it's silent therefore when i play music it's like being immersed in the sound. the car has technology that makes it drive itself, it steers itself to safety while i override the zone and keep control. it's magnificent if you like that sort of thing, plus being hybrid it is cheap to run and easy to charge.

the vibe at mission control is changing now, the bathroom is fantastic, the balcony is unreal as is my new furniture and space. once the garage is converted i will be living in the perfect environment.

fuck walt disney, what a bunch of nasty hypocrites cancelling gina carano for her social media post. it was not racist it was smart and intelligent, suggesting hate and division effects the way people understand one another. it was a warning suggesting that the current age of cancellation, vilifying people who think differently or have an alternative view can result in totalitarian society where children grow up hating the other, be it hindu, muslim, christian or in this case jew. the left proves time after time it is misogynistic because it went after gina and not her co star whom did the same thing but he is a man. disney prove they are racist hypocrites because they bend over backwards to thank the chinese communist party for mulan, yet that party actually has a million muslims in camps, they sterilize the women and organ harvest the rest. pretty close to the nazi camps when you think about it without the gas. so disney cosies up to those bastards but cancels a woman for saying, 'be nice.' perhaps the fucking idiots need to wake up to themselves, because left wing cancel morons, disney himself was a anti semitic nazi whom exploited his talent and stole their ideas. 

the problem is people are so invested in being, 'woke' or 'left' they are frightened about speaking the truth. companies now trawl through social media looking for a reason to fire people especially if you are not a left wing zombie. i am getting older now and although i started out with socialist humanist ideals, the more time i spend in the world the more i can't stand the left. they turned out to be the fascist right and they are winning, because anyone whom disagrees is cancelled. it's absurd and will end in tears. 

i don't mind being cancelled, in fact i rather be with the cancelled than the cancellers. they cancelled me in china, this blog is banned so i am already in good company

the great unveiling today, a new bathroom, wow it looks amazing, i've moved some plants in there over the bathing area to give it a jungle like feel, some scented candles and aroma theraphy stuff, float tank bliss.

yesterday was a rain soaked wash out, the garden grows even wilder, jungle within, jungle without let it happen, green goddesses, silver plumed birds, red flowers and sprawling ferns. bromeliads and rubber flame trees, huge palms and banana trees and an elephant ears plant competing against them all. i may transplant that baby, keep it indoors. 

my grass is like corn, it forms a new crop circle design as it collapses inwards. intricate lines cut across the circle and when i look from above the design is an old formula i recognise for a pentagram.  interesting.

birds chirp at dawn, busy they come to the resting place, as do the water dragons and the young native that likes to attack it's reflection. mm that reminds me of someone.

then there's the sun streaming this morning, a new day, valentines day as sunlight filters through the trees, through the fronds and plumes, through the tall grass and bamboo. 

i am rising, i am awake.

new point

ancient light

new light

ancient point

my dream

i was surprised, as i had come to the end of the road

there we were, holding hands

it was the climax

you were in the mouth of a bottomless well

and i clasped you tight and then remembered your words

so i let you go

and upon your face

you wore the look of horror

as the blackness ate you

ancient point

new light

ancient light

new point