first day back at work, i'm awake to early thanks to my jet lagged lag at 4am, although at 4am with no electric lights i am limited by what i can do, so i fold clothes and take pansy for a walk, by 7 i am at work. it's strange as i feel so detached from everything, even as the clients all greet me i'm somewhere else, my body goes through the motions but my spirit is mia.
what does it mean, i don't know, i get through the day and head home for seclusion. right now that's what i want, just to be left alone to deal with the bullshit i have to face, money is a curse for me, it eludes me, i don't understand how people can keep hold off it, why does it seem like only me who is prone to these disasters that stop me saving anything. i guess it could be worse, once i pay of my several thousand dollars debt i will hopefully move ahead to something better and worthwhile, for the moment i have to limit myself to staying in, reading and folding my clothes.