Tuesday, May 07, 2019

twin flames, what a strange idea, i always figured i was unique and alone. i was quite content being alone, happy and at peace. i'd found my zen paradise and then WHACK!
you fell out from the sky. is this real you kept asking. well yeah, i am real. i wish i wasn't. i'd like to be a dream or fantasy but i'm real. everything about me is real despite my fucking unreal life. are you fucking real? 
my first question to you this time around was, 'who fucking sent you?'
that's not me being paranoid baby, that's me being real.
all that twin flame stuff you sent me i never really liked hearing about it, it was something alien and to far out for me even. i liked the romantic element but we never had that. we had a triangle and there was no romance so how could that seem real to me. 
yet some of it got through, that stuff made sense, it described me.
i don't understand much about it, everyone seems to know more than me on the subject. i often ask random people if they have ever heard of such a thing and they all say, 'ohh yeah, it's amazing.' 
see, i'm the last one to know these things.
so are you my twin? 
it would appear there is something in this right?
how do you explain it. 
i can't.
then the new video you sent that describes your position, wow! 
i did understand that although it took two listens and a friend to explain some of it to me. okay, i don't understand all of it, i don't follow other people's ideas and concepts but that lady seemed to have a much clearer way of expressing the position than i had heard and yes, some of it did penetrate my mind. 
so now i find myself in a different space, clear and fresh, a good place where i can move fast and forwards. i still don't subscribe to  an idea just because someone else has mapped it out, i find that slightly absurd. my marriage ended because some tarot card woman said i had an affair, a complete lie, yet my ex believed this to be true. therefore i have great apprehension in following a lot of these people however in my self i trust therefore, i'm letting it all go, i can do that. it's what i do until i find someone whom i can hold onto.

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